W. C. Fields on alcohol
W. C. Fields96 quotes“Wouldn’t it be terrible if I quoted some reliable statistics which prove that more people are driven insane through religious hysteria than by drinking alcohol.”
More from W. C. Fields
I exercise strong self control. I never drink anything stronger than gin before breakfast.
W. C. FieldsW. C. Fields I spent half my money on gambling, alcohol and wild women. The other half I wasted.
W. C. FieldsW. C. Fields I don’t have to attend every argument I’m invited to.
W. C. FieldsW. C. Fields I never met a kid I liked.
W. C. FieldsW. C. Fields Anyone who hates children and animals can’t be all bad.
W. C. FieldsW. C. Fields Somebody’s been putting pineapple juice in my pineapple juice!
W. C. FieldsW. C. Fields When we have lost everything, including hope, life becomes a disgrace, and death a duty.
W. C. FieldsW. C. Fields Start every day off with a smile and get it over with.
W. C. FieldsW. C. Fields I have spent a lot of time searching through the Bible for loopholes.
W. C. FieldsW. C. Fields I drink therefore I am.
W. C. FieldsW. C. Fields When life hands you lemons, make whisky sours.
W. C. FieldsW. C. Fields Drat! Being the encapsulated view of life.
W. C. FieldsW. C. Fields Reality is an illusion that occurs due to the lack of alcohol.
W. C. FieldsW. C. Fields Everybody’s got to believe in something. I believe I’ll have another beer.
W. C. FieldsW. C. Fields I never voted for anybody. I always voted against.
W. C. FieldsW. C. Fields If pigs had wings, they would be pigeons.
W. C. FieldsW. C. Fields
Original quotes
From our community writers
I’ve grown tired of playing the warrior In the battle between me And my demons.
J.S BrownJ.S Brown No matter how many storms pass through it, this heart is still a gentle thing.
Sabina LauraSabina Laura If you want to start something great, you need commitment. But if you want to finish that something great, you need consistency.
Alison ButcherAlison Butcher Abundance is my birthright it starts with harvesting my inner light.
Shannon Van AlstShannon Van Alst I believed in the magic we made, but you were the magician and i was merely your puppet on stage.
Sophie AliaSophie Alia Eternity is vague. Let me fill in the blanks with you.
Addison SchmittAddison Schmitt Action is the key that solves all your problems.
Abel StarcAbel Starc His promises looked so promising that she just ignored the blatant truths.
Krishan PandeyKrishan Pandey
Meet the writers
More on alcohol
We got more provisions for our whiskey than the same money, which we paid for the liquor, would have bought; so after all it proved a very profitable investment.
Buffalo BillBuffalo Bill As adults we try to relax from the never-ending quest for reason and order by drinking a little whiskey or smoking whatever works for us, but the wisdom isn’t in the whiskey or the smoke. The wisdom is in the moments when the madness slips away and we remember the basics.
Willie NelsonWillie Nelson As adults we try to relax from the never-ending quest for reason and order by drinking a little whiskey or smoking whatever works for us, but the wisdom isn’t in the whiskey or the smoke. The wisdom is in the moments when the madness slips away and we remember the basics.
Willie NelsonWillie Nelson I was thinking that women should put pictures of missing husbands on beer cans.
Steven WrightSteven Wright Writer’s block is a fancy term made up by whiners so they can have an excuse to drink alcohol.
Steve MartinSteve Martin It was the fault of David Trezeguet, who made me do one drink of vodka after another. I slept in the bathtub. Now I hold my vodka much better.
Zlatan IbrahimovićZlatan Ibrahimović As a monk, I have to be cautious of overindulgence; it is essential to stay regulated in our habits.
Gaur Gopal DasGaur Gopal Das You won’t hear any more alcohol songs from Snoop Dogg – unless I stumble upon some Hennessy.
Snoop DoggSnoop Dogg