When you wake up in the morning, smile – and get it over with.
W. C. FIELDSWhen you wake up in the morning, smile – and get it over with.
W. C. FIELDSI don’t believe in dining on an empty stomach.
W. C. FIELDSI never voted for anybody. I always voted against.
W. C. FIELDSAttitude is more important than the past, than education, than money, than circumstances, than what people do or say. It is more important than appearance, giftedness, or skill.
W. C. FIELDSDon’t worry about your heart, it will last you as long as you live.
W. C. FIELDSI never smoked a cigar in my life until I was nine.
W. C. FIELDSIt is well to remember that there are five reasons for drinking: the arrival of a friend, one’s present or future thirst, the excellence of the cognac, or any other reason.
W. C. FIELDSIt ain’t what they call you, it’s what you answer to.
W. C. FIELDSMoney will not buy happiness, but it will let you be unhappy in nice places.
W. C. FIELDSWhen doctors and undertakers meet, they wink at each other.
W. C. FIELDSSleep! The most beautiful experience in life. Except drink.
W. C. FIELDSI’m free of all prejudices. I hate everyone equally.
W. C. FIELDSI never drink water. I’m afraid it will become habit-forming.
W. C. FIELDSThere’s no such thing as a tough child – if you parboil them first for seven hours, they always come out tender.
W. C. FIELDSYou can’t trust water: Even a straight stick turns crooked in it.
W. C. FIELDSI exercise strong self control. I never drink anything stronger than gin before breakfast.
W. C. FIELDS