black
grey
blue
red
brown
white

When life hands you lemons, make whisky sours.

W. C. Fields

Prayers never bring anything, They may bring solace to the sap, the bigot, the ignorant, the aboriginal, and the lazy – but to the enlightened it is the same as asking Santa Claus to bring you something for Xmas.
W. C. FIELDS

Gift Ignorance Peace Prayer Wisdom
Now don’t say you can’t swear off drinking; it’s easy. I’ve done it a thousand times.
W. C. FIELDS

Easy Time Yourself
Don’t worry about your heart, it will last you as long as you live.
W. C. FIELDS

Heart Live Worry Yourself
There comes a time in the affairs of man when he must take the bull by the tail and face the situation.
W. C. FIELDS

Face Man Time
Comedy is a serious business. A serious business with only one purpose -to make people laugh.
W. C. FIELDS

Business Laugh Oneself People Purpose Serious
My illness is due to my doctor’s insistence that I drink milk, a whitish fluid they force down helpless babies.
W. C. FIELDS

Doctor Force Myself
It ain’t what they call you, it’s what you answer to.
W. C. FIELDS

Attitude Deep Yourself
I never smoked a cigar in my life until I was nine.
W. C. FIELDS

Life Myself Young
Some people are born losers; others acquire the knack gradually.
W. C. FIELDS

Born Lose People
Children should neither be seen or heard from – ever again.
W. C. FIELDS

Children Hate See
I used to be indecisive, now I’m not so sure.
W. C. FIELDS

Improvement Myself
Sex isn’t necessary. You don’t die without it, but you can die having it.
W. C. FIELDS

Death Necessary Sex Yourself
Start every day off with a smile and get it over with.
W. C. FIELDS

Morning Smile Start
Yes I do like children, Girl children, about eighteen or twenty.
W. C. FIELDS

Children Myself Woman
If it does not work the first time, try, try again. Then quit. No need to be an idiot.
W. C. FIELDS

Need Quit Stupidity Time
When life hands you lemons, make whisky sours.
W. C. FIELDS

Hands Life Yourself

When life hands you lemons, make whisky sours.

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When life hands you lemons, make whisky sours.

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