“I love a dog. He does nothing for political reasons.”

There is nothing so stupid as the educated man if you get him off the thing he was educated in.

You know horses are smarter than people. You never heard of a horse going broke betting on people.

You’ve got to go out on a limb sometimes because that’s where the fruit is.

If advertisers spent the same amount of money on improving their products as they do on advertising then they wouldn’t have to advertise them.

Buy land. They ain’t making any more of the stuff.

Even if you’re on the right track, you’ll get run over if you just sit there.

Never miss a good chance to shut up.

Advertising is the art of convincing people to spend money they don’t have for something they don’t need.

What the country needs is dirtier fingernails and cleaner minds.

We will never have true civilization until we have learned to recognize the rights of others.

The only difference between death and taxes is that death doesn’t get worse every time Congress meets.

You never get a second chance to make a first impression.

On account of being a democracy and run by the people, we are the only nation in the world that has to keep a government four years, no matter what it does.

Common sense ain’t common.

Don’t gamble; take all your savings and buy some good stock and hold it till it goes up, then sell it. If it don’t go up, don’t buy it.

Communism is like prohibition, it is a good idea, but it won’t work.

Any woman who does not thoroughly enjoy tramping across the country on a clear frosty morning with a good gun and a pair of dogs does not know how to enjoy life.

On the one hand, I want to go off and live in the desert with my dog and sculpt things out of adobe.

Inside of me there are two dogs. One is mean and evil and the other is good and they fight each other all the time. When asked which one wins I answer, the one I feed the most.

Man is an animal that makes bargains: no other animal does this – no dog exchanges bones with another.

I do not wish to be shut up in a corral. All agency Indians I have seen are worthless. They are neither red warriors nor white farmers. They are neither wolf nor dog.

Aristocrats have heirs; the poor have children; the rest keep dogs.

You will never reach your destination if you stop and throw stones at every dog that barks. Better we keep biscuits and go.

The serpent, the king, the tiger, the stinging wasp, the small child, the dog owned by other people, and the fool: these seven ought not to be awakened from sleep.