I come around to your house personally and wet your finger while you’re turning the pages.
BOB HOPEI never kick my ball in the rough or improve my lie in a sand trap. For that I have a caddie.
More Bob Hope Quotes
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It’s amazing how many people you see on TV. I did my first television show a month ago, and the next day five million television sets were sold. The people who couldn’t sell theirs threw them away.
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I love to go to Washington – if only to be near my money.
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Don’t tempt me, I can resist anything but temptation.
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US President Gerald Ford’s golf was so bad we thought he was a ‘Hitman for the PGA!
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Television. That’s where movies go when they die.
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I was lucky I wasn’t a better boxer, or that’s what I’d be now – a punchy ex-pug.
BOB HOPE -
When we recall the past, we usually find that it is the simplest things – not the great occasions – that in retrospect give off the greatest glow of happiness.
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Kids are wonderful, but I like mine barbecued.
BOB HOPE -
Golf is a game that needlessly prolongs the lives of some of our most useless citizens.
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There’s a very apt saying in show business: “If you don’t go over budget in Paris, you’re either very rich or very sick. “
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I always like to go to Washington D.C. It gives me a chance to visit my money.
BOB HOPE -
I’ve been married fifty-five years and I’ve been home three weeks.
BOB HOPE -
Chiropractic is a wonderful means of natural healing!
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She spoke perfect English, which led to considerable trouble. She couldn’t understand us at all.
BOB HOPE -
I feel very humble, but I think I have the strength of character to fight it.
BOB HOPE -
A photographer kept shooting me every time I swung. I was very flattered until I found out he was from Field and Stream.
BOB HOPE -
I’d give up golf if I didn’t have so many sweaters.
BOB HOPE -
Be happy you guys. Be proud! You know what you are: you’re God’s frozen people.
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I’ve got to watch myself these days. It’s too exciting watching anyone else.
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I’ve never wanted an Oscar, although they are reassuring to an actor who doesn’t know how really great he is.
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The firm is really ahead of the times. It has a stock market ticker that prints its report on thin aspirins.
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The service at the Imperial (Tokyo) is the finest I’ve encountered anywhere. There was a button next to my bed marked ROOM SERVICE – and a maid to press it for me.
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People who throw kisses are hopelessly lazy.
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The Concorde is great. It gives you three extra hours to find your luggage.
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At the Academy Award Dinners all the actors and actresses in Hollywood gather around to see what someone else thinks about their acting besides their press agents.
BOB HOPE -
I like to play in the low 70’s. If it gets any hotter than that I’ll stay in the bar!
BOB HOPE