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Bigamy is the only crime where two rites make a wrong.

Bob Hope

Don’t tempt me, I can resist anything but temptation.
BOB HOPE

Anything Resist Temptation
Everybody knows what California smog is – that’s fog with the vitamins removed.
BOB HOPE

Country Fog Funny Remove
He hits the ball 130 yards and his jewelry goes 150.
BOB HOPE

Balls Go Golf Yards
By the 9th hole they were engaged and when they finished on 18 they had a foursome.
BOB HOPE

Eighteen Engaged Finished Foursome
Lots of travel, away from home.
BOB HOPE

Away From Home Line One
The Concorde is great. It gives you three extra hours to find your luggage.
BOB HOPE

Funny Giving Humor
I once showed Pat Bradley my swing and said, ‘What do I do next?’ Pat replied, ‘Wait till the pain dies down.’
BOB HOPE

Dies Golf Pain Swings
I went to play golf and tried to shoot my age, but I shot my weight instead.
BOB HOPE

Age Golf Play Tried Weight
We’re on our way to the Persian Gulf. Wait! It’s a mistake! I thought they said Persian Golf.
BOB HOPE

Golf Mistake Persian Waiting Way
She got to enjoy the personal side of the players. They were her kids. The Braves were her family.
BOB HOPE

Braves Family Kid Players
If my golf game was a prize fight, they’d stop it.
BOB HOPE

Fighting Games Golf
Congratulations to whoever is finally booking music we love. It’s going to get us out of the house after dark!
BOB HOPE

Congratulations Dark House
I’ve never wanted an Oscar, although they are reassuring to an actor who doesn’t know how really great he is.
BOB HOPE

Actors Oscar Reassuring
I have performed for 12 presidents and entertained only six.
BOB HOPE

Men President Six
I tell jokes to pay my green fees.
BOB HOPE

Golf Green Pay
I’d give up golf if I didn’t have so many sweaters.
BOB HOPE

Giving Golf Sweaters Up

Bigamy is the only crime where two rites make a wrong.

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Bigamy is the only crime where two rites make a wrong.

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