I feel like I’m a time traveler from the future who has been sent back to be annoyed.
ADAM CAROLLAI’m a doofus from the Valley, a blue-collar guy.
More Adam Carolla Quotes
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I think if you create something and you get an audience for it, then the monetization part is really secondary.
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A lot of guys and people in our society think that chicks just love dudes with money.
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If you’re a guy, you have absolutely no idea what’s going on at any time in the relationship, ever.
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I don’t think healthcare’s a right. The only right you have is the ability to go out on an even playing field and work, and then purchase health insurance, or whatever it is.
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I like my parents but they are just not good parents. They are nice enough people. I’m not interested in hurting their feelings.
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I don’t have anything against my mom, but my family has no emotional connection to each other.
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The reason I hate publicists is because I think if we got rid of them everything would be on equal footing.
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I used to be a Democrat, now I’m basically a Republican.
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When I say things that sound insane, like only the smartest million people should have the right to vote, well, I mean that.
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If in 1989 I said, ‘I have an idea: Bottle water and sell it. And charge more than a beer,’ they would have chased me around with a giant butterfly net. The same with paying to watch a television station.
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I’m not comically oriented. I get angry and I start complaining and then people start laughing. I don’t even want them to laugh half the time.
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There is a ton of pressure and you need to read cue cards. I am not a good cue card reader.
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Well, the post office is probably not the place you want to go if you want to be infused with patriotism and a renewed sense of vigor.
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I know everything because I know nothing.
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I’m a sort of nuts-and-bolts guy. I’m into turning wrenches and swinging a hammer and wrenching on cars.
ADAM CAROLLA