I’m a doofus from the Valley, a blue-collar guy.
ADAM CAROLLAIf you’ve driven over to the gay section of Los Angeles, it’s like a golf course… Real estate values go ‘boom!’
More Adam Carolla Quotes
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The Aston Martin is a beautiful car. It’s a work of art, I love the interior and the style of the car.
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There are certain things women are better at than men.
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This is why the terrorists hate us. And it’s not the glitter and it’s not the pomp and circumstance.
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California is like the hot blond high school chick who’s been getting by on her looks, but now she’s 45 and falling apart.
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I’m just gonna tell her, “Be a staff writer for a sitcom. Because they’ll have to hire you, they can’t really fire you, and you don’t have to produce that much. It’ll be awesome.”
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I have feelings that are to the right, and I have feelings that land on the left side of the aisle.
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Welfare is monetary methadone.
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When Asian people grow up fast they go to college at 13. White people grow up fast it’s about fudge packing and triple D’s at 13.
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I am not a good cue card reader.
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I’ve got a great eye for color. I’m like a chick.
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Being a poor reader was enough to make me not want to do that type of formatted show
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Well, the post office is probably not the place you want to go if you want to be infused with patriotism and a renewed sense of vigor.
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If women built the bridges or were meant to build the bridges, then they would have done it.
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My life is about building and working and wrenching on some cars.
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Toss some Hungarian in every once in a while. You will not be sorry. Good, solid peasant food.
ADAM CAROLLA