When you do television, there’s more to do, and when you do new television, there’s a lot more to do, especially when you don’t have partner. I miss not having that person.
ADAM CAROLLAPeople look at me, and they go, ‘You’re white, you’re smart, you must have went to college. You must have grown up with money.’
More Adam Carolla Quotes
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But the idea that I was making $10 an hour and stacking drywall while these guys were making a few hundred thousand, and they were having a party, and there were Playmates and there were good times, I just couldn’t imagine it.
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I didn’t have any success in show business until I was 30 to 31 years of age.
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When I am king, I will revise the sexual bases system so that getting to first base will include oral sex and sodomy!
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When I say things that sound insane, like only the smartest million people should have the right to vote, well, I mean that.
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Asking someone in advance not judge you, is like asking someone in advance not to smell you.
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I could definitely see myself making a serious movie or a drama in the future.
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And the mirror ball doesn’t care what color you are, and it doesn’t care how rich your parents are, and it doesn’t care what God you pray to
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Welfare is monetary methadone.
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I’m just gonna tell her, “Be a staff writer for a sitcom. Because they’ll have to hire you, they can’t really fire you, and you don’t have to produce that much. It’ll be awesome.”
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I swear my car won’t run unless I’m picking my nose: At least, I’m that superstitious about it, so I don’t want to take any chances.
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Whoever is for higher taxes, feel free to pay higher taxes.
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Speaking of sleeping bags, has anything ever had a less creative name?
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We never pick up a brush and stand in front of our own easel.
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If women built the bridges or were meant to build the bridges, then they would have done it.
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That’s an interesting philosophical question. When your boner goes away, is that one gone… forever?
ADAM CAROLLA