My first car was a motorcycle.
ADAM CAROLLAThe thing about a good podcast is you have to have a good host. If you don’t have a compelling host then you have nothing.
More Adam Carolla Quotes
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The main thing that I learned from my horrible job experiences was how horrible they were.
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Wearing Crocs is like getting blown by a dude. It feels great until you look down and realize you’re gay.
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You shouldn’t be eating anything that takes six minutes to microwave.
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. It’s an even wooden floor, and may the best man or woman win. And I say God bless Dancing with the Stars, and God bless the USA.
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People are stupid. There’s a lot of dumb stuff that’s successful.
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It’s like the Fouth of July in my underpants.
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I want to work for myself, and I do work for myself. I make plenty of money working for myself.
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When I’m in power, here’s how I’m gonna put the country back on its feet. I’m going to put sterilizing agents in the following products: Sunny Delight, Mountain Dew, and Thick-Crust Pizza. Only the ‘tardiest of the ‘tards like the thick crust.
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The best gift you can give yourself is some drive–that thing inside of you that gets you out the door to the gym, job interviews, and dates.
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Honestly, I’ve always had difficulty relaxing, unwinding and going to bed – that kind of stuff.
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I don’t burn any calories trying to be masculine; I just happen to be from that world.
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No, I had not read any other comedian’s book. Not that I don’t enjoy other comedians; I’m just not a reader.
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I think people have a strong desire to push me and others into some sort of political box that they can wrap their minds around.
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What we used to settle with common sense or a fist, we settle with hand sanitizer and lawyers.
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I used to be a Democrat, now I’m basically a Republican.
ADAM CAROLLA