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I’ve learned that we should be glad God doesn’t give us everything we ask for.

Andy Rooney

I’ve learned, That to ignore the facts does not change the facts.
ANDY ROONEY

Change Fact Ignorance Learning Myself
I’ve learned. That when you plan to get even with someone, you are only letting that person continue to hurt you more.
ANDY ROONEY

Hurt Learning Person Planning Yourself
Never trust the food in a restaurant on top of the tallest building in town that spends a lot of time folding napkins.
ANDY ROONEY

Fold Food Restaurant Time Trust
The third rule of life is this: Everything you buy today is smaller, more expensive, and not as good as it was yesterday.
ANDY ROONEY

Expensive Goodness Rule Small Yourself
Don’t take a butcher’s advice on how to cook meat. If he knew, he’d be a chef.
ANDY ROONEY

Advice Cook Himself Meat
You can’t be a good writer without being a good thinker.
ANDY ROONEY

Goodness Poet Thinking Writer Yourself
The best classroom in the world is at the feet of an elderly person.
ANDY ROONEY

Class Person Room World
I’ve learned That opportunities are never lost; someone will take the ones you miss.
ANDY ROONEY

Learning Lost Missing Opportunity Position Yourself
Elephants and grandchildren never forget.
ANDY ROONEY

Animal Forget Grandparents
In the futile attempts we all make to tidy up our lives and our surroundings, nothing is more difficult than throwing out a book.
ANDY ROONEY

Book Difficult Live Surround
I’ve learned that life is like a roll of toilet paper. The closer it gets to the end, the faster it goes.
ANDY ROONEY

End Fast Learning Myself Paper
Computers make it easier to do a lot of things, but most of the things they make it easier to do don’t need to be done.
ANDY ROONEY

Computer Easy Need Work
I’ve learned that under everyone’s hard shell is someone who wants to be appreciated and loved.
ANDY ROONEY

Appreciation Hard Learning Love
Guns do not make you a killer. I think killing makes you a killer. You can kill someone with a baseball bat or a car, but no one is trying to ban you from driving to the ball game.
ANDY ROONEY

Drive Game Kill Thinking Yourself
Women realize it’s not worth buying an entire pig just to get a little sausage!
ANDY ROONEY

Buy Food Realization Woman Worth
Happiness depends more on how life strikes you than on what happens.
ANDY ROONEY

Happiness Life Strike Yourself

I’ve learned that we should be glad God doesn’t give us everything we ask for.

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I’ve learned that we should be glad God doesn’t give us everything we ask for.

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