Mad, adj. Affected with a high degree of intellectual independence.
AMBROSE BIERCEPray: To ask the laws of the universe to be annulled on behalf of a single petitioner confessedly unworthy.
More Ambrose Bierce Quotes
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Electricity is the power that causes all natural phenomena not known to be caused by something else
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There are two instruments worse than a clarinet – two clarinets.
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Abstainer: a weak person who yields to the temptation of denying himself a pleasure.
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History is an account, mostly false, of events, mostly unimportant, which are brought about by rulers, mostly knaves, and soldiers, mostly fools.
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Conservative, n: A statesman who is enamored of existing evils, as distinguished from the Liberal who wishes to replace them with others.
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Optimism – the doctrine or belief that everything is beautiful, including what is ugly.
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Wine, madam, is God’s next best gift to man.
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Selfish, adj. Devoid of consideration for the selfishness of others.
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Opposition, n. In politics the party that prevents the government from running amuck by hamstringing it.
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Fear has no brains; it is an idiot.
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Death is not the end. There remains the litigation over the estate.
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Alliance – in international politics, the union of two thieves who have their hands so deeply inserted in each other’s pockets that they cannot separately plunder a third.
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Lottery: A tax on people who are bad at math.
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True, man does not know woman. But neither does woman.
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Debt, n. An ingenious substitute for the chain and whip of the slavedriver.
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