Mausoleum, n: the final and funniest folly of the rich.
AMBROSE BIERCELabor is one of the processes by which A acquires property for B.
More Ambrose Bierce Quotes
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Fear has no brains; it is an idiot.
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Forgetfulness – a gift of God bestowed upon debtors in compensation for their destitution of conscience.
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RATIONAL, adj. Devoid of all delusions save those of observation, experience and reflection.
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Women of genius commonly have masculine faces, figures and manners. In transplanting brains to an alien soil God leaves a little of the original earth clinging to the roots.
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Vote: the instrument and symbol of a freeman’s power to make a fool of himself and a wreck of his country.
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Brain: an apparatus with which we think we think.
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Logic: The art of thinking and reasoning in strict accordance with the limitations and incapacities of the human misunderstanding.
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The most affectionate creature in the world is a wet dog.
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Patriotism. Combustible rubbish ready to the torch of any one ambitious to illuminate his name.
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Money. A blessing that is of no advantage to us excepting when we part with it.
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Sweater, n.: garment worn by child when its mother is feeling chilly.
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IMAGINATION, n. A warehouse of facts, with poet and liar in joint ownership.
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Marriage, n: the state or condition of a community consisting of a master, a mistress, and two slaves, making in all, two.
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Future. That period of time in which our affairs prosper, our friends are true and our happiness is assured.
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The only distinction that democracies reward is a high degree of conformity.
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