Riot – A popular entertainment given to the military by innocent bystanders.
AMBROSE BIERCEIn each human heart are a tiger, a pig, an ass and a nightingale. Diversity of character is due to their unequal activity.
More Ambrose Bierce Quotes
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To the eye of failure success is an accident.
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Bore, n. A person who talks when you wish him to listen.
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True, man does not know woman. But neither does woman.
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Year: A period of three hundred and sixty-five disappointments.
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Prescription: A physician’s guess at what will best prolong the situation with least harm to the patient.
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Fear has no brains; it is an idiot.
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He who thinks with difficulty believes with alacrity. A fool is a natural proselyte, but he must be caught young, for his convictions, unlike those of the wise, harden with age.
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Philosophy: A route of many roads leading from nowhere to nothing.
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Scriptures – The sacred books of our holy religion, as distinguished from the false and profane writings on which all other faiths are based.
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He who thinks with difficulty believes with alacrity.
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Politics: A strife of interests masquerading as a contest of principles. The conduct of public affairs for private advantage.
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Patience, n. A minor form of dispair, disguised as a virtue.
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Edible, adj.: Good to eat, and wholesome to digest, as a worm to a toad, a toad to a snake, a snake to a pig, a pig to a man, and a man to a worm.
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Lottery: A tax on people who are bad at math.
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There are two instruments worse than a clarinet – two clarinets.
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