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In each human heart are a tiger, a pig, an ass and a nightingale. Diversity of character is due to their unequal activity.

Ambrose Bierce

Year: A period of three hundred and sixty-five disappointments.
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Disappointment Perspective Time
Prescription: A physician’s guess at what will best prolong the situation with least harm to the patient.
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Harm Patient Prescription Situation
IMAGINATION, n. A warehouse of facts, with poet and liar in joint ownership.
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Fact Imagination Lying Poet
Democracy is four wolves and a lamb voting on what to have for lunch.
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Democracy Lamb Lunch Vote Wolf
The covers of this book are too far apart.
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Book Distance
Christian, n.: one who believes that the New Testament is a divinely inspired book admirably suited to the spiritual needs of his neighbor.
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Believe Divine Need Neighbor Religion Spiritual
Absurdity, n.: A statement or belief manifestly inconsistent with one’s own opinion.
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Belief Manifestation Opinion Statement
Patriotism. Combustible rubbish ready to the torch of any one ambitious to illuminate his name.
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Ambition Himself Name Patriot
MYTHOLOGY, n. The body of a primitive people’s beliefs concerning its origin, early history, heroes, deities and so forth, as distinguished from the true accounts which it invents later.
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Belief Body History Invention Original People True
An election is nothing more than the advanced auction of stolen goods.
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Advantage Election Good Stolen
Eloquence, n. The art of orally persuading fools that white is the color that it appears to be. It includes the gift of making any color appear white.
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Appearance Art Color Fools White
Abstainer: a weak person who yields to the temptation of denying himself a pleasure.
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Happiness Temptation Weakness
Love: A temporary insanity curable by marriage.
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Love Marriage Sanity Temporary
Accordion, n. An instrument in harmony with the sentiments of an assassin.
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Assasination Harmony Instrument
Conversation, n.: A vocal competition in which the one who is catching his breath is called the listener.
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Breathe Conversation Listening Vocal
Labor is one of the processes by which A acquires property for B.
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Labor Pregnant Property
Responsibility, n. A detachable burden easily shifted to the shoulders of God, Fate, Fortune, Luck or one’s neighbor. In the days of astrology it was customary to unload it upon a star.
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Astrology Custom Easy Fate God Responsibility
Belladonna, n.: In Italian a beautiful lady; in English a deadly poison. A striking example of the essential identity of the two tongues.
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Beautiful Death Essential Example Poison
Don’t steal; thou’lt never thus compete successfully in business. Cheat.
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Business Cheating Complete Steal Success
Ocean: A body of water occupying about two-thirds of a world made for man – who has no gills.
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Body Man Ocean World
I think that I think, therefore I think that I am.
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Myself Reputation Thinking
Saint: A dead sinner revised and edited.
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Death Edit Revision Sin
What is a democrat? One who believes that the republicans have ruined the country. What is a republican? One who believes that the democrats would ruin the country.
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Believe Country Democracy Oneself Ruin
Riot – A popular entertainment given to the military by innocent bystanders.
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Entertainment Innocent Military Popular
ARMOR, n. The kind of clothing worn by a man whose tailor is a blacksmith.
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Blacksmith Cloth Kind Man
REFLECTION,n: An Action of the mind whereby we obtain a clearer view of our relation to the things of yesterday and are able to avoid the perils that we shall not again encounter.
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Avoid Mindset Ourselves Reflection Relationship
RUMOR, n. A favorite weapon of the assassins of character.
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Assassination Character Weapon

In each human heart are a tiger, a pig, an ass and a nightingale. Diversity of character is due to their unequal activity.

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In each human heart are a tiger, a pig, an ass and a nightingale. Diversity of character is due to their unequal activity.

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