IMAGINATION, n. A warehouse of facts, with poet and liar in joint ownership.
AMBROSE BIERCEPatience, n. A minor form of dispair, disguised as a virtue.
More Ambrose Bierce Quotes
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PITY, n. A failing sense of exemption, inspired by contrast.
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The most affectionate creature in the world is a wet dog.
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Accordion, n. An instrument in harmony with the sentiments of an assassin.
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Fear has no brains; it is an idiot.
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Abstainer: a weak person who yields to the temptation of denying himself a pleasure.
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True, man does not know woman. But neither does woman.
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RUMOR, n. A favorite weapon of the assassins of character.
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History is an account, mostly false, of events, mostly unimportant, which are brought about by rulers, mostly knaves, and soldiers, mostly fools.
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Responsibility, n. A detachable burden easily shifted to the shoulders of God, Fate, Fortune, Luck or one’s neighbor. In the days of astrology it was customary to unload it upon a star.
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Philosophy: A route of many roads leading from nowhere to nothing.
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Knowledge is the small part of ignorance that we arrange and classify.
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MYTHOLOGY, n. The body of a primitive people’s beliefs concerning its origin, early history, heroes, deities and so forth, as distinguished from the true accounts which it invents later.
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In each human heart are a tiger, a pig, an ass and a nightingale. Diversity of character is due to their unequal activity.
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Future. That period of time in which our affairs prosper, our friends are true and our happiness is assured.
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There is nothing new under the sun but there are lots of old things we don’t know.
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