I can’t be naturalistic enough to make it sound real. So instead, I just wander around aimlessly knowing that I’ll be funny enough with stream of consciousness until I get to the actual explosively funny part.
NORM MACDONALDYou know, with Hitler, the more I learn about that guy, the more I don’t care for him.
More Norm MacDonald Quotes
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The reason we have few friends in adversity, is, because we have no true ones in prosperity.
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Scientists believe they may have discovered a primitive form of life on Jupiter’s moon Europa. That primitive form of life? You guessed it, Frank Stallone.
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When people told the audience that [Sam Kinison] was good, he was accepted after that.
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A great cause of evil in the world is that men seldom think themselves criminal if they offer the same injustice to others that has been successfully practiced on themselves.
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Reason is always weak where prejudice is strong.
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It is necessary to be tolerant, in order to be tolerated.
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Instead of loving your enemies, have no enemies to love.
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This would have been a great game to watch if we didn’t have any money on it.
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I don’t have any ambition.
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He that searches for praise will often find contempt.
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Liberty, like health, appears most precious when lost.
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Ignorance is better than knowledge misapplied.
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All my life’s about is cracking up people and them cracking me up and trying not to think about dying. That doesn’t cost very much money.
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There are two things at which most men are grieved: when their faults are exposed, and when their virtues are concealed.
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You know, with Hitler, the more I learn about that guy, the more I don’t care for him.
NORM MACDONALD