It is often better to be restricted to necessity than unconfined in the measure of our desires: prosperity destroys more individuals than adversity ruins.
NORM MACDONALDWhen I hear a guy lost a battle to cancer, that really did bother me, that that’s a term. It implies that he failed and that somebody else that defeated cancer is heroic and courageous.
More Norm MacDonald Quotes
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The praise we seek for our own virtues sometimes tempts us to flatter the imperfections of other men.
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It is necessary to be tolerant, in order to be tolerated.
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Few people love with the violence they hate.
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In estimating the adversities of life, we would seldom have much reason to complain of the evils we suffer, did we understand the dangers we daily escape.
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I got my computer. The great thing about the computer is that you only need enough money to buy a computer and some food, and you’re all right. I don’t have to go to premières.
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It is vain to complain of fortune while we fail in policy and conduct.
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Few are more unhappy than those who have great ambition, but little energy to urge it into activity.
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I want you to buy this pit bull. This will protect your valuables.’ I don’t own anything very valuable. If I buy the pit bull, that would be the most valuable thing I own. I’d have to buy something to protect it then.
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During misfortunes, nothing aggravates our condition more, than to be esteemed deserving of them.
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Chastity is oftener owing to diffidence and shame, than to fortitude of reason or virtue.
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Yeah man, they call gambling a disease, but it’s the only disease where you can win a bunch of money.
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A great cause of evil in the world is that men seldom think themselves criminal if they offer the same injustice to others that has been successfully practiced on themselves.
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A lot of writers come from Harvard and such, and are rich, and they write under the misapprehension that poor people are stupid. So when they do write them, they are hillbillies or rednecks or Christian idiots.
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I don’t care for sex. I find it an embarrassing, dull exercise. I prefer sports, where you can win.
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You ever be having a really good dream, and then, uh- right in the middle of the dream you wake up, right in the best part of the dream? And there you are, back in your stinkin’ life again? Man, that’s rough, eh?
NORM MACDONALD






