It is necessary to be tolerant, in order to be tolerated.
NORM MACDONALDBack in the old days, a man could just get sick and die. Now they have to wage a battle. So my Uncle Bert is waging a courageous battle, which I’ve seen, because I go and visit him. And this is the battle: he’s lying in the hospital bed, with a thing in his arm, watching Matlock on the TV.
More Norm MacDonald Quotes
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Flattery succeeds best on minds previously occupied by conceit.
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Chastity is oftener owing to diffidence and shame, than to fortitude of reason or virtue.
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I think clever people think that poor people are stupid.
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It is often better to be restricted to necessity than unconfined in the measure of our desires: prosperity destroys more individuals than adversity ruins.
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Violent people usually express their love of a thing by their hatred of its opposite.
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Few are more unhappy than those who have great ambition, but little energy to urge it into activity.
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A great cause of evil in the world is that men seldom think themselves criminal if they offer the same injustice to others that has been successfully practiced on themselves.
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The standard of morals is as variable as morals themselves; of which every nation has a different code, and every custom a different reading.
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Instead of loving your enemies, have no enemies to love.
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There are two things at which most men are grieved: when their faults are exposed, and when their virtues are concealed.
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Comedy is surprises, so if you’re intending to make somebody laugh and they don’t laugh, that’s funny.
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In estimating the adversities of life, we would seldom have much reason to complain of the evils we suffer, did we understand the dangers we daily escape.
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The joy a person is usually seen to express at the conversion of another to his opinion is seldom more than the impulse of egotistical satisfaction at being considered worthy of didactic imitation.
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The first principle of solid wisdom is discretion, without it all the erudition of life is merely bagatelle.
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I don’t know the difference between a hippie and a hipster but, it’s fun to watch either one of them get beat up.
NORM MACDONALD






