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Be thankful we’re not getting all the government we’re paying for.

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The man who never makes a mistake must get tired of doing nothing.
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Never slap a man who’s chewing tobacco.
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The worst thing that happens to you may be the best thing for you if you don’t let it get the best of you.
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Everything is changing. People are taking their comedians seriously and the politicians as a joke.
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I belong to no organized party. I am a Democrat.
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On account of being a democracy and run by the people, we are the only nation in the world that has to keep a government four years, no matter what it does.
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The man with the best job in the country is the vice-president. All he has to do is get up every morning and say, ‘How is the president?’
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An onion can make people cry but there’s never been a vegetable that can make people laugh.
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Even if you’re on the right track, you’ll get run over if you just sit there.
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