black
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If you can’t dazzle them with brilliance, baffle them with bull.

W. C. Fields

Take me down to the bar! We’ll drink breakfast together!
W. C. FIELDS

Togetherness Travel
Sleep! The most beautiful experience in life. Except drink.
W. C. FIELDS

Beautiful Experience Life
Attitude is more important than the past, than education, than money, than circumstances, than what people do or say. It is more important than appearance, giftedness, or skill.
W. C. FIELDS

Appearance Attitude Education Important Money Past People Skill
When we have lost everything, including hope, life becomes a disgrace, and death a duty.
W. C. FIELDS

Death Hope Life Lost
I have spent a lot of time searching through the Bible for loopholes.
W. C. FIELDS

Myself Religion Time
The laziest man I ever met put popcorn in his pancakes so they would turn over by themselves.
W. C. FIELDS

Food Funny Man Myself
Philadelphia, wonderful town, spent a week there one night.
W. C. FIELDS

Night Time Wonderful
Some weasel took the cork out of my lunch.
W. C. FIELDS

Animal Food
A woman drove me to drink and I didn’t even have the decency to thank her.
W. C. FIELDS

Herself Thankful Woman
The world is getting to be such a dangerous place, a man is lucky to get out of it alive.
W. C. FIELDS

Alive Danger Man Place World
Sex isn’t necessary. You don’t die without it, but you can die having it.
W. C. FIELDS

Death Necessary Sex Yourself
My main ambition as a gardener is to water my orange trees with gin, then all I have to do is squeeze the juice into a glass.
W. C. FIELDS

Ambitious Myself Tree
I never drink water because of the disgusting things that fish do in it.
W. C. FIELDS

Animal Myself Perspective Sea
I don’t have to attend every argument I’m invited to.
W. C. FIELDS

Argument Attitude Myself
Reality is an illusion that occurs due to the lack of alcohol.
W. C. FIELDS

Alcohol Illusion Reality
I’m looking for loopholes. (Said when caught reading the Bible.
W. C. FIELDS

Myself Religious

If you can’t dazzle them with brilliance, baffle them with bull.

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If you can’t dazzle them with brilliance, baffle them with bull.

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