black
grey
blue
red
brown
white

If you can’t dazzle them with brilliance, baffle them with bull.

W. C. Fields

It is well to remember that there are five reasons for drinking: the arrival of a friend, one’s present or future thirst, the excellence of the cognac, or any other reason.
W. C. FIELDS

Excellence Friendship Future Present Reason Remember
Philadelphia, wonderful town, spent a week there one night.
W. C. FIELDS

Night Time Wonderful
I used to be indecisive, now I’m not so sure.
W. C. FIELDS

Improvement Myself
You can fool some of the people some of the time and that’s enough to make a decent living.
W. C. FIELDS

Enough Fools Live People Time Yourself
Children should neither be seen or heard from – ever again.
W. C. FIELDS

Children Hate See
A man without a woman is like a neck without a pain.
W. C. FIELDS

Man Pain Woman
Was I in here last night and did I spend a $20 bill? Oh, thank goodness… I thought I’d lost it.
W. C. FIELDS

Goodness Lost Myself Night Thankful
A thing worth having is a thing worth cheating for.
W. C. FIELDS

Worth Wrong
I never drink water. I’m afraid it will become habit-forming.
W. C. FIELDS

Habit Mad Myself Weird
Money will not buy happiness, but it will let you be unhappy in nice places.
W. C. FIELDS

Happiness Instagram Captions Money Place
Try till you succeed, if you don’t succeed once, then destroy all evidence of the fact that you tried!
W. C. FIELDS

Destroy Evidence Success Yourself
I like children. If they’re properly cooked.
W. C. FIELDS

Children Food Myself
A rich man is nothing but a poor man with money.
W. C. FIELDS

Man Money Poor Rich
I’m looking for loopholes. (Said when caught reading the Bible.
W. C. FIELDS

Myself Religious
Few things in life are more embarrassing than the necessity of having to inform an old friend that you have just got engaged to his fiancee.
W. C. FIELDS

Friendship Life Marriage Necessary Old Relationship
Comedy is merely tragedy happening to someone else.
W. C. FIELDS

Deep Reality Tragedy

If you can’t dazzle them with brilliance, baffle them with bull.

Related Topics

Popular Authors

If you can’t dazzle them with brilliance, baffle them with bull.

Related Topics

Popular Authors

More W. C. Fields Quotes