black
grey
blue
red
brown
white

I was in love with a beautiful blonde once. She drove me to drink. That’s the one thing I’m indebted to her for.

W. C. Fields

I have spent a lot of time searching through the Bible for loopholes.
W. C. FIELDS

Myself Religion Time
It ain’t what they call you, it’s what you answer to.
W. C. FIELDS

Attitude Deep Yourself
The world is getting to be such a dangerous place, a man is lucky to get out of it alive.
W. C. FIELDS

Alive Danger Man Place World
Philadelphia, wonderful town, spent a week there one night.
W. C. FIELDS

Night Time Wonderful
I never drink water because of the disgusting things that fish do in it.
W. C. FIELDS

Animal Myself Perspective Sea
I cook with wine, sometimes I even add it to the food.
W. C. FIELDS

Food Myself Wine
When doctors and undertakers meet, they wink at each other.
W. C. FIELDS

Doctor Togetherness
I must have a drink of breakfast.
W. C. FIELDS

Food Morning Myself
If I had to live my life over, I’d live over a saloon.
W. C. FIELDS

Life Live Myself
During one of my treks through Afghanistan, we lost our corkscrew. We were compelled to live on food and water for several days.
W. C. FIELDS

Food Live Lost Struggle Travel
I never drink water. I’m afraid it will become habit-forming.
W. C. FIELDS

Habit Mad Myself Weird
No doubt exists that all women are crazy; it’s only a question of degree.
W. C. FIELDS

Crazy Doubt Existence Woman
The clever cat eats cheese and breathes down rat holes with baited breath.
W. C. FIELDS

Animal Breathe
Christmas at my house is always at least six or seven times more pleasant than anywhere else. We start drinking early. And while everyone else is seeing only one Santa Claus, we’ll be seeing six or seven.
W. C. FIELDS

Funny Home Start Time
Some people are born losers; others acquire the knack gradually.
W. C. FIELDS

Born Lose People
Attitude is more important than the past, than education, than money, than circumstances, than what people do or say. It is more important than appearance, giftedness, or skill.
W. C. FIELDS

Appearance Attitude Education Important Money Past People Skill

I was in love with a beautiful blonde once. She drove me to drink. That’s the one thing I’m indebted to her for.

Related Topics

Popular Authors

I was in love with a beautiful blonde once. She drove me to drink. That’s the one thing I’m indebted to her for.

Related Topics

Popular Authors

More W. C. Fields Quotes