black
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Somebody’s been putting pineapple juice in my pineapple juice!

W. C. Fields

I was in love with a beautiful blonde once. She drove me to drink. That’s the one thing I’m indebted to her for.
W. C. FIELDS

Beautiful Herself Love Myself
I don’t drink water. Have you seen the way it rusts pipes?
W. C. FIELDS

Destroy Myself See
Anyone who hates children and animals can’t be all bad.
W. C. FIELDS

Animal Bad Children Hate
It ain’t what they call you, it’s what you answer to.
W. C. FIELDS

Attitude Deep Yourself
If pigs had wings, they would be pigeons.
W. C. FIELDS

Animal Funny Wings
If I had to live my life over, I’d live over a saloon.
W. C. FIELDS

Life Live Myself
It’s a funny old world. A man’s lucky if he gets out of it alive.
W. C. FIELDS

Alive Funny Old World
I drink therefore I am.
W. C. FIELDS

Instagram Captions Myself One Liner
My illness is due to my doctor’s insistence that I drink milk, a whitish fluid they force down helpless babies.
W. C. FIELDS

Doctor Force Myself
I certainly do not drink all the time. I have to sleep you know.
W. C. FIELDS

Funny Myself Time
I am an expert of electricity. My father occupied the chair of applied electricity at the state prison.
W. C. FIELDS

Father Myself Prison
I never eat before breakfast.
W. C. FIELDS

Eat Myself One Liner
I don’t drink anymore, on the other hand I don’t drink any less either.
W. C. FIELDS

Alcohol Myself
Trust everybody, but cut the cards yourself.
W. C. FIELDS

Trust Yourself
Children should neither be seen or heard from – ever again.
W. C. FIELDS

Children Hate See
I have been advised by the best medical authority, at my age, not to attempt to give up alcohol.
W. C. FIELDS

Advice Age Alcohol Authority Give Up Myself

Somebody’s been putting pineapple juice in my pineapple juice!

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Somebody’s been putting pineapple juice in my pineapple juice!

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