black
grey
blue
red
brown
white

If pigs had wings, they would be pigeons.

W. C. Fields

I personally stay away from natural foods. At my age I need all the preservatives I can get.
W. C. FIELDS

Age Food Myself Need
Few things in life are more embarrassing than the necessity of having to inform an old friend that you have just got engaged to his fiancee.
W. C. FIELDS

Friendship Life Marriage Necessary Old Relationship
I always keep a supply of stimulant handy in case I see a snake, which I also keep handy.
W. C. FIELDS

Animal Hands Myself See
I certainly do not drink all the time. I have to sleep you know.
W. C. FIELDS

Funny Myself Time
I don’t believe in dining on an empty stomach.
W. C. FIELDS

Believe Empty Food Myself Weird
I never smoked a cigar in my life until I was nine.
W. C. FIELDS

Life Myself Young
I must have a drink of breakfast.
W. C. FIELDS

Food Morning Myself
A man without a woman is like a neck without a pain.
W. C. FIELDS

Man Pain Woman
I have spent a lot of time searching through the Bible for loopholes.
W. C. FIELDS

Myself Religion Time
Just like my Uncle Charlie used to say, just before he sprung the trap: He said, You can’t cheat and honest man! Never give a sucker an even break or smarten up a chump!
W. C. FIELDS

Break Himself Honesty Man Myself Smart Yourself
I don’t drink water. Have you seen the way it rusts pipes?
W. C. FIELDS

Destroy Myself See
Start every day off with a smile and get it over with.
W. C. FIELDS

Morning Smile Start
A thing worth having is a thing worth cheating for.
W. C. FIELDS

Worth Wrong
Sleep! The most beautiful experience in life. Except drink.
W. C. FIELDS

Beautiful Experience Life
Some people are born losers; others acquire the knack gradually.
W. C. FIELDS

Born Lose People
I cook with wine, sometimes I even add it to the food.
W. C. FIELDS

Food Myself Wine

If pigs had wings, they would be pigeons.

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If pigs had wings, they would be pigeons.

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