If it ain’t broke, you can probably still fix it.
TIM ALLENKids learn by example. If I respect Mom, they’re going to respect Mom.
More Tim Allen Quotes
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I have always enjoyed do-it-yourself projects, .. Being in a position to actually help design and bring tools to market is an incredible opportunity. Being able to fund charities as a result is phenomenal.
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I had a very easy time loving an audience. But when it’s one-on-one with somebody, all I wanted to do was run away, because maybe they’re going to want something from me I can’t give, or they’re going to hurt me.
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Jill, we became parents so we could tell our kids what to do. Otherwise we’re just the tallest people living here.
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I have an only child. She’s so independent and good with adults.
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Women are like cars: we all want a Ferrari, sometimes want a pickup truck, and end up with a station wagon.
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I think women like Ferraris. A Ferrari is everybody’s car.
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I’ve gotten so far past the Android and iPhones that I’m back to a flip-phone. It’s funny, you can buy antique flip-phones online. A lot of us collect them. Clearly, they’re considered antiques.
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You don’t know what people are really like until they’re under a lot of stress.
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I don’t understand why it has to be either – or – either socialism or democracy. Why can’t we combine things to get the best of each system?
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In marriage, compromise nurtures the relationship.
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Never comment on a woman’s rear end. Never use the words ‘large’ or ‘size’ with ‘rear end’. Never. Avoid the area altogether. Trust me.
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They say you only go around once, but with a muscle car you can go around two or three times.
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Men are pigs. Too bad we own everything.
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When somebody tells you they’re not very smart, they’re saying exactly the opposite.
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I think there’s a percentage that don’t realize, that don’t know that [standup] is how everything began. We planned it, we work hard, rehearsals to get this. It’s more of a it’s not just coming in there in a T-shirt and holding a microphone.
TIM ALLEN