“As the Chinese will tell you, history depends on your point of view.”

I blend memories. I blend them into one that’s funny. I exaggerate to clarify.

I do a lot of family shows.

Be wary of listening to stories secondhand.

Can we take a direct flight back to reality or do we have to change planes in Denver?

I had a very easy time loving an audience. But when it’s one-on-one with somebody, all I wanted to do was run away, because maybe they’re going to want something from me I can’t give, or they’re going to hurt me.

I love doing logos. I’ve been a graphic artist all my life.

The world’s a mean place. It’s unfair, then it’s fair. It’s hateful, then it’s loving. It’s a very peculiar place on philosophical and metaphysical and religious levels.

In marriage, compromise nurtures the relationship.

In my experience, it’s all wonderful with girls until about 16. Around that time, boys kind of calm down and start focusing their testosterone. Girls get a little challenging, especially for fathers.

Anytime you work with animals, you begin to see more humanity in them.

I’ve gotten so far past the Android and iPhones that I’m back to a flip-phone. It’s funny, you can buy antique flip-phones online. A lot of us collect them. Clearly, they’re considered antiques.

I have an only child. She’s so independent and good with adults.

For years, I just did not like this idea of God, church.

If you don’t decide where you’re going, life will decide for you.

Before Kady was born, I didn’t think having a kid would be such a big deal. My attitude was simple: Babies are nice, play with them, put them in the closet until the next time.

But separate a man from his car – that’s inhuman.

Your self-worth is determined by you. You don’t have to depend on someone to tell you who you are.

Everything has a purpose. And that purpose has a story that goes along with it. It just depends on what your passion is.

The extraordinary woman depends on the ordinary woman.

Our liberty depends on the freedom of the press, and that cannot be limited without being lost.

Everyone’s not good at everything, it’s ok to depend on someone.

You can make something of your life. It just depends on your drive.

The quality of our life depends on the quality of the seeds that lie deep in our consciousness.

Protecting our future on this planet depends on the conscious evolution of our species.