For years, I just did not like this idea of God, church.
TIM ALLEN
While awaiting sentencing, I decided to give stand-up comedy a shot. The judge had suggested I get my act together, and I took him seriously.
More Tim Allen Quotes
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For years, I just did not like this idea of God, church.
TIM ALLEN -
In my experience, it’s all wonderful with girls until about 16. Around that time, boys kind of calm down and start focusing their testosterone. Girls get a little challenging, especially for fathers.
TIM ALLEN -
All men like to think that they can do it alone, but a real man knows that there no substitute for support , encouragement or a pit crew.
TIM ALLEN -
I wonder if to stare into the face of God will drive me crazy. (I wonder who would blink first.)
TIM ALLEN -
Men aren’t men until they can get to Sears by themselves.
TIM ALLEN -
When you’re 6 or 7, your father becomes this wonderful presence in your life. I really responded to my father. And then, the very moment I realized that I loved him unconditionally, that life was going to be great just because he was in it, he was gone.
TIM ALLEN -
Can we take a direct flight back to reality or do we have to change planes in Denver?
TIM ALLEN -
Real men don’t use instructions, son. Besides, this is just the manufacturer’s opinion on how to put this together.
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I have a thing for tools.
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I’m actually more of a cat guy than a dog person because I travel so much. I love cats.
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Sometimes you get the sense that the Creator is getting to that point of “Yeah, we might have to reboot.”
TIM ALLEN -
I think women like Ferraris. A Ferrari is everybody’s car.
TIM ALLEN -
I was gone so much in my first marriage. I love the moments when I engage with my youngest daughter now. It’s not my thing to sit on the ground and play tea party, but I’ll do it because it’s a moment that will stick with me forever.
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I have to get a licence to drive a motorcycle to protect myself and the people around me. I am adamant there should be some sort of licensing required to have children.
TIM ALLEN -
You don’t know what people are really like until they’re under a lot of stress.
TIM ALLEN