You don’t know what people are really like until they’re under a lot of stress.
TIM ALLEN
Dogs will eat till they die. Cats will leave food in the dish, incomprehensible to a dog.
More Tim Allen Quotes
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You don’t know what people are really like until they’re under a lot of stress.
TIM ALLEN -
I’m actually more of a cat guy than a dog person because I travel so much. I love cats.
TIM ALLEN -
Men are liars. We’ll lie about lying if we have to. I’m an algebra liar. I figure two good lies make a positive.
TIM ALLEN -
I do a lot of family shows.
TIM ALLEN -
I think women like Ferraris. A Ferrari is everybody’s car.
TIM ALLEN -
I think there’s a percentage that don’t realize, that don’t know that [standup] is how everything began. We planned it, we work hard, rehearsals to get this. It’s more of a it’s not just coming in there in a T-shirt and holding a microphone.
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In marriage, compromise nurtures the relationship.
TIM ALLEN -
I love doing logos. I’ve been a graphic artist all my life.
TIM ALLEN -
Women are brilliant. Every woman knows how to do the weirdest thing right out of the bucket. Every woman knows how to do that Hindu head wrap with the towel out of the shower. Ever try to do that? You look like a drunk Iraqi soldier.
TIM ALLEN -
Women now have choices. They can be married, not married, have a job, not have a job, be married with children, unmarried with children. Men have the same choice we’ve always had: work, or prison.
TIM ALLEN -
Sometimes you get the sense that the Creator is getting to that point of “Yeah, we might have to reboot.”
TIM ALLEN -
When somebody tells you they’re not very smart, they’re saying exactly the opposite.
TIM ALLEN -
My dad’s death reminds me of earthquakes – things that shake your foundation.
TIM ALLEN -
I don’t understand why it has to be either – or – either socialism or democracy. Why can’t we combine things to get the best of each system?
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I wonder if to stare into the face of God will drive me crazy. (I wonder who would blink first.)
TIM ALLEN