Why go to a church to worship God? A church is man made. God never said, “And let there be aluminum siding.” Climbing a tree to talk to God sounds like a better idea since only God can make a tree. And if that tree’s on a golf course, all the better.
TIM ALLENIf you want to condemn yourself for the mistakes you’ve made, let’s be fair, that means you’ve got to congratulate yourself for all the good things you’ve done. It’s okay to say, “God, I wish I’d done this; yeah, but I did do that.” Then it kind of balances out.
More Tim Allen Quotes
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Jill, we became parents so we could tell our kids what to do. Otherwise we’re just the tallest people living here.
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For years, I just did not like this idea of God, church.
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I’m sad for adults who want to be children. And children who want to be adults.
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I love doing logos. I’ve been a graphic artist all my life.
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In marriage, compromise nurtures the relationship.
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I am a thespian trapped in a man’s body.
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Boys can be disgusting. You can’t leave us alone for any length of time because we will burn something, blow something up or paint something. We’re just obnoxious.
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Nothing’s as easy as it is on a sitcom. Issues that we take care of in 20 minutes on the show can stretch out over years in real families.
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Playing golf is like going to a strip joint. After 18 holes you are tired and most of your balls are missing.
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I used to live an isolated existence, even in relationships, but now my family knows me for who I really am. Mostly, that’s a good thing.
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The ego is like a kid in the basement: It’s best to keep him busy.
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My mom said the only reason men are alive is for lawn care and vehicle maintenance.
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But separate a man from his car – that’s inhuman.
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If you want to condemn yourself for the mistakes you’ve made, let’s be fair, that means you’ve got to congratulate yourself for all the good things you’ve done. It’s okay to say, “God, I wish I’d done this; yeah, but I did do that.” Then it kind of balances out.
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Man is the only animal to borrow tools.
TIM ALLEN