Men are pigs. Too bad we own everything.
TIM ALLENAnytime you work with animals, you begin to see more humanity in them.
More Tim Allen Quotes
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They say you only go around once, but with a muscle car you can go around two or three times.
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All men like to think that they can do it alone, but a real man knows that there no substitute for support , encouragement or a pit crew.
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Man is the only animal to borrow tools.
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Jill, we became parents so we could tell our kids what to do. Otherwise we’re just the tallest people living here.
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Why go to a church to worship God? A church is man made. God never said, “And let there be aluminum siding.” Climbing a tree to talk to God sounds like a better idea since only God can make a tree. And if that tree’s on a golf course, all the better.
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I’m a very bad student, but a great learner.
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When I went to jail, reality hit so hard that it took my breath away, took my stance away, took my strength away. I was there buck naked, humiliated, sitting in my own crap and urine – this is a metaphor. My ego had run off. Your ego is the biggest coward.
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Electricity can be dangerous. My nephew tried to stick a penny into a plug. Whoever said a penny doesn’t go far didn’t see him shoot across that floor. I told him he was grounded.
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Can we take a direct flight back to reality or do we have to change planes in Denver?
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I’m one of these guys that just spoils the environment. I like ATVs and snowmobiles. I have a motorcycle up there, and I like cruising through the hills.
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I wonder if to stare into the face of God will drive me crazy. (I wonder who would blink first.)
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I had a very easy time loving an audience. But when it’s one-on-one with somebody, all I wanted to do was run away, because maybe they’re going to want something from me I can’t give, or they’re going to hurt me.
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Women now have choices. They can be married, not married, have a job, not have a job, be married with children, unmarried with children. Men have the same choice we’ve always had: work, or prison.
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I’m a creative guy, artistically with graphics.
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Anytime you work with animals, you begin to see more humanity in them.
TIM ALLEN






