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Clones are people two.

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Marilyn Monroe Paulo Coelho Abraham Lincoln C. S. Lewis Khalil Gibran Charlie Chaplin Gautama Buddha Isaac Newton

Why is a person who plays the piano called a pianist but a person who drives a racing car not called a racist?
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Funny Identity Person Play Race
When I was in school the teachers told me practice makes perfect; then they told me nobody’s perfect so I stopped practicing.
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Education Funny Myself Perfection Practice Stop Teacher
Someone asked me, if I were stranded on a desert island what book would I bring… ‘How to Build a Boat.’
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Abandonment Book Build Funny Myself Ocean Yourself
Always remember your unique, just like everyone else.
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Remember Self Love Unique Worth Yourself
You know what scares me? When you have to be nice to some paranoid schizophrenic, just because she lives in your head.
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Act Attitude Head Herself Live Scare Yourself
No one is listening until you make a mistake.
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Listening Mistake Yourself
Why doesn’t Tarzan have a beard? Why doesn’t glue stick to the inside of the bottle?
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Appearance Funny Hairs Stick
I’m addicted to placebos. I could quit, but it wouldn’t matter.
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Addiction Difference Myself Quit
The early bird gets the worm, but the second mouse gets the cheese.
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Advice Bird Deep Funny Patience Worm
If you take an Oriental person and spin him around several times, does he become disoriented?
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Discipline Funny Himself Person Time
Everywhere is within walking distance if you have the time.
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Distance Time Walk Yourself
If man evolved from monkeys and apes, why do we still have monkeys and apes?
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Animal Evolution Monkey Science
Half the people you know are below average.
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Average Level People Yourself
One time a cop pulled me over for running a stop sign. He said, “Didn’t you see the stop sign?” I said, “Yeah, but I don’t believe everything I read”
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Believe Funny Myself Police Reading See Stop Time
If vegetarians eat vegetables, what do humanitarians eat?
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Eat Food Funny Human
I intend to live forever. So far, so good.
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Far Forever Goodness Immortal Live Myself

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