Always do business as if the person you’re doing business with is trying to screw you, because he probably is. And if he’s not, you can be pleasantly surprised.
STEVE MARTINI was always very shy but as I get older I think, What am I being shy for? You just grow weary of your own hang-ups.
More Steve Martin Quotes
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I really enjoy finding the right word, creating a good, flowing sentence. I enjoy the rhythm of the words.
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There’s someone out there for everyone – even if you need a pickaxe, a compass, and night goggles to find them.
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I believe the United States should allow all foreigners in this country, provided they can speak our native language… Apache.
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Thankfully, persistence is a great substitute for talent.
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I was deeply unhappy, but I didn’t know it because I was so happy all the time.
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I actually learned about sex watching neighborhood dogs. And it was good. Go ahead and laugh. I think the most important thing I learned was: Never let go of the girl’s leg, no matter how hard she tries to shake you off.
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It’s not what you know, it’s what you think you know.
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It was essential that I never show doubt about what I was doing.
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A father carries pictures where his money used to be.
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The conscious mind is the editor, and the subconscious mind is the writer.
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Before you criticize a man, walk a mile in his shoes. That way, when you do criticize him, you’ll be a mile away and have his shoes.
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I believe in equality. Equality for everybody. No matter how stupid they are or how superior I am to them.
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I thought yesterday was the first day of the rest of my life but it turns out today is.
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Chaos in the midst of chaos isn’t funny, but chaos in the midst of order is.
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You can’t really conduct your life by one or two phrases.
STEVE MARTIN






