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When I die, now don’t think that I’m a nut, don’t want no fancy funeral, just one like old King Tut.

Steve Martin

I’m not trying to be a big shot or anything like that, but I get my drinks half price.
STEVE MARTIN

Drink Myself Price Try
Talking about music is like dancing about architecture.
STEVE MARTIN

Artitect Dance Music Talk
There’s no better way to learn something than to learn it in front of an audience. Your terror drives you.
STEVE MARTIN

Audience Better Drive Inspirational Learning Motivational Terrorism Yourself
You have to get comfortable with your work, you really have to know what you’re doing, and it has to be almost boring to you to be able to do it well.
STEVE MARTIN

Boredom Comfortable Work Yourself
Despite a lack of natural ability, I did have the one element necessary to all early creativity: naïveté, that fabulous quality that keeps you from knowing just how unsuited you are for what you are about to do.
STEVE MARTIN

Ability Element Natural Necessary Quality Yourself
Dinosaurs did not walk with humans. The evolutionary record says different. They gambled.
STEVE MARTIN

Different Evolution Human Walk
I guess I wouldn’t believe in anything if it weren’t for my lucky astrology mood watch.
STEVE MARTIN

Astrology Believe Luck Myself
I actually learned about sex watching neighborhood dogs. And it was good. Go ahead and laugh. I think the most important thing I learned was: Never let go of the girl’s leg, no matter how hard she tries to shake you off.
STEVE MARTIN

Animal Funny Goodness Important Laughter Learning Myself Sex
Some people have a way with words, and other people; oh, uh, not have way.
STEVE MARTIN

Choice People Way Word
All I’ve ever wanted was an honest week’s pay for an honest day’s work.
STEVE MARTIN

Honesty Myself Pay Work
There is one thing I would break up over, and that is if she caught me with another woman. I won’t stand for that.
STEVE MARTIN

Break Up Cheating Herself Myself Woman
There’s someone out there for everyone – even if you need a pickaxe, a compass, and night goggles to find them.
STEVE MARTIN

Need People Relationship Soul Mate Yourself
First the doctor told me the good news: I was going to have a disease named after me.
STEVE MARTIN

Doctor Funny Goodness Myself Sick
I believe in equality. Equality for everybody. No matter how stupid they are or how superior I am to them.
STEVE MARTIN

Believe Equality Myself Stupidity
You know that look that women get when they want to have sex? Me neither.
STEVE MARTIN

Appearance Funny Myself Sex Woman Yourself
Always make room for the unexpected in yourself.
STEVE MARTIN

Expectation Inspirational Motivational Room Yourself

When I die, now don’t think that I’m a nut, don’t want no fancy funeral, just one like old King Tut.

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When I die, now don’t think that I’m a nut, don’t want no fancy funeral, just one like old King Tut.

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