I guess I wouldn’t believe in anything if it weren’t for my lucky astrology mood watch.
STEVE MARTINI actually learned about sex watching neighborhood dogs. And it was good. Go ahead and laugh. I think the most important thing I learned was: Never let go of the girl’s leg, no matter how hard she tries to shake you off.
More Steve Martin Quotes
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Acting has helped me understand people, not only because you are acting as a character, but also because you are watching other actors work. That really helps you identify in life when someone is acting, not being true.
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I just downloaded eleven hundred books onto my Kindle, and now I can’t lift it.
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I was deeply unhappy, but I didn’t know it because I was so happy all the time.
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A day without sunshine is like, you know, night.
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Thankfully, persistence is a great substitute for talent.
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How many people have never raised their hand before?
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I believe that sex is one of the most beautiful, natural, wholesome things that money can buy.
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Always make room for the unexpected in yourself.
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I was always very shy but as I get older I think, What am I being shy for? You just grow weary of your own hang-ups.
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Writer’s block is a fancy term made up by whiners so they can have an excuse to drink alcohol.
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Before you criticize a man, walk a mile in his shoes. That way, when you do criticize him, you’ll be a mile away and have his shoes.
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I love money. I love everything about it.
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Through the years, I have learned there is no harm in charging oneself up with delusions between moments of valid inspiration.
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There is one thing I would break up over, and that is if she caught me with another woman. I won’t stand for that.
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Dinosaurs did not walk with humans. The evolutionary record says different. They gambled.
STEVE MARTIN