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If you kill me, I promise you – you will never take me alive.

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Alive Kill Myself Promise Yourself

Bagwalas

Popular Authors

Marilyn Monroe Paulo Coelho Abraham Lincoln C. S. Lewis Khalil Gibran Charlie Chaplin Gautama Buddha Isaac Newton

To Harry Secombe: I hope you die first as I don’t want you singing at my funeral.
SPIKE MILLIGAN

Death Hope Myself Sing Yourself
Aristocrats have heirs; the poor have children; the rest keep dogs.
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Children Dog Funny Rich
A lot of learning can be a little thing.
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Knowledge Learning One Liner Wisdom
In India a farmhand was caught in the act with his cow. He said he had bad eyesight and thought it was his wife.
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Farm Hands Himself Wife
Blessed are the cracked, for they let in the light.
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Blessing Deep Hard Time Light Perspective Philosophy
I thought I’d begin by reading a poem by Shakespeare, but then I thought, why should I? He never reads any of mine.
SPIKE MILLIGAN

Beginning Book Funny Myself Poem Reading
I’m a hero with coward’s legs.
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Coward Hero Legs Myself
Chopsticks are one of the reasons the Chinese never invented custard.
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Food Invention Reason
If I don’t eat soon, I’ll die of hunger; and if I die, I won’t eat soon.
SPIKE MILLIGAN

Death Eat Hungry Myself
I told you I was sick.
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Myself One Liner Sick
There is a time to live, a time to die, a time to laugh, and at no time are the three of them very far apart.
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Death Far Laughter Live Time
Any man can be 62, but it takes a bus to be 62A.
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Age Man Vehicle
Contraceptives should be used on every conceivable occasion.
SPIKE MILLIGAN

Occasion Protection
It was a perfect marrige. She didn`t want to and he couldn`t
SPIKE MILLIGAN

Funny Himself Marriage Perfection
I spent many years laughing at Harry Secombe’s singing until somebody told me that it wasn’t a joke.
SPIKE MILLIGAN

Joke Laughter Myself Sing
There are holes in the sky Where the rain gets in, But they’re ever so small That’s why rain is thin.
SPIKE MILLIGAN

Rain Sky

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