To Harry Secombe: I hope you die first as I don’t want you singing at my funeral.
SPIKE MILLIGANIf you kill me, I promise you – you will never take me alive.
More Spike Milligan Quotes
-
-
Aristocrats have heirs; the poor have children; the rest keep dogs.
SPIKE MILLIGAN -
A lot of learning can be a little thing.
SPIKE MILLIGAN -
In India a farmhand was caught in the act with his cow. He said he had bad eyesight and thought it was his wife.
SPIKE MILLIGAN -
Blessed are the cracked, for they let in the light.
SPIKE MILLIGAN -
I thought I’d begin by reading a poem by Shakespeare, but then I thought, why should I? He never reads any of mine.
SPIKE MILLIGAN -
I’m a hero with coward’s legs.
SPIKE MILLIGAN -
Chopsticks are one of the reasons the Chinese never invented custard.
SPIKE MILLIGAN -
If I don’t eat soon, I’ll die of hunger; and if I die, I won’t eat soon.
SPIKE MILLIGAN -
I told you I was sick.
SPIKE MILLIGAN -
There is a time to live, a time to die, a time to laugh, and at no time are the three of them very far apart.
SPIKE MILLIGAN -
Any man can be 62, but it takes a bus to be 62A.
SPIKE MILLIGAN -
Contraceptives should be used on every conceivable occasion.
SPIKE MILLIGAN -
It was a perfect marrige. She didn`t want to and he couldn`t
SPIKE MILLIGAN -
I spent many years laughing at Harry Secombe’s singing until somebody told me that it wasn’t a joke.
SPIKE MILLIGAN -
There are holes in the sky Where the rain gets in, But they’re ever so small That’s why rain is thin.
SPIKE MILLIGAN