My life has been wild enough to derive all of the stories you need out of it. I’ve been through many, many years of behavioral problems, so I don’t really look outside for stories.
RON WHITEIf you watch the ‘Blue Collar Comedy Tour,’ don’t expect that when you come see me by myself, ’cause it’s a little rougher.
More Ron White Quotes
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I do live like a rock star, but it’s not as great as it sounds. It’s a lot of traveling.
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I guarantee there’s people who watch television who have no idea how complicated it is to make a television show.
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I would have rather been beat by a plumber than Kathy Griffin.
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I could do no wrong in my mother’s eyes from the day I was born. My fans bought her a very nice house in San Antonio, and she has a great life.
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I believe everything creative is somewhat collaborative. If you’re a painter and someone stretches your canvas, it was collaborative on some level.
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My biggest pet peeve, I guess, is other comedians criticizing Larry the Cable Guy.
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I’m not the judge of who that is, but I am a believer that no debt in the universe goes unpaid. If you try to buy early, you’ll pay late.
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I get e-mail from all over the world, and from lawyers and doctors and whoever – plumbers and drywall hangers.
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My show is more storytelling now than it’s ever been. It’s what I’m good at.
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You can tell on-stage when a joke’s starting to lose its pop. It doesn’t mean people don’t want to hear it anymore; it means I don’t want to do it anymore. Because I want to move on to something that has a knee-jerk reaction just like you get when you tell somebody a joke that they’ve never heard.
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I begged the universe to make me a famous comedian, and it did. So I tend not to ask for any more.
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I don’t think we have a surplus of fine educators in this country that we can just start dropping them for no reason whatsoever.
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I go to more open mic nights than open mikers.
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If you watch the ‘Blue Collar Comedy Tour,’ don’t expect that when you come see me by myself, ’cause it’s a little rougher.
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Other states are trying to abolish the death penalty… mine’s putting in an express lane.
RON WHITE