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You’ve got to realize that when all goes well, and everything is beautiful, you have no comedy. It’s when somebody steps on the bride’s train, or belches during the ceremony that you’ve got comedy!

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Beautiful Bribe Comedy Everything Goes Got Realize Somebody Step Train

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Marilyn Monroe Paulo Coelho Abraham Lincoln C. S. Lewis Khalil Gibran Charlie Chaplin Gautama Buddha Isaac Newton

My body’s in such bad shape I wear prescription underwear.
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Bad Body Phase Prescription Shape Such Underwater Wear
There’s such a buildup of crud in my oven, there’s only room to bake a single cupcake.
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Bake Buildup Crud Cupcake Open Roo Single Such
Most children threaten at times to run away from home. This is the only thing that keeps some parents going.
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… if they [your children] write their names in the dust on the furniture, don’t let them put the year.
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I like to serve chocolate cake, because it doesn’t show the dirt.
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I’m looking for a perfume to overpower men – I’m sick of karate.
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Next to gold and jewelry, health is the most important thing you can have.
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Maybe it’s true that life begins at fifty. But everything else starts to wear out, fall out, or spread out.
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Tennis is like marrying for money. Love means nothing.
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self-pity is better than none.
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I’m the only woman who can walk in Central Park at night… and reduce the crime rate.
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Before you get married you should meet your fiance’s parents. It is not enough that you like his parole officer.
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All mothers are working mothers.
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All Mother Working
The reason women don’t play football is because 11 of them would never wear the same outfit in public.
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I’m eighteen years behind in my ironing. There’s no use doing it now, it doesn’t fit anybody I know.
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Anybody Behind Doing Eighteen Iron Know Now Use Year
My husband always felt that a marriage and career don’t mix. That’s why he’s never worked.
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