Envy, like a false mirror, distorts the symmetry of the sweetest form.
NORM MACDONALDThe young compliment their greatness on the number of their friends; the old, on the confidence of them.
More Norm MacDonald Quotes
-
-
When I hear a guy lost a battle to cancer, that really did bother me, that that’s a term. It implies that he failed and that somebody else that defeated cancer is heroic and courageous.
NORM MACDONALD -
I don’t really like politics that much. And I like the order and simplicity of sports. They have an ending. You can argue with your friends about it, but in the end you still like sports. I almost love the fantasy world of sports more than the real world.
NORM MACDONALD -
Hypocrisy is the outward acknowledgment of inward shame.
NORM MACDONALD -
He that searches for praise will often find contempt.
NORM MACDONALD -
I want you to buy this pit bull. This will protect your valuables.’ I don’t own anything very valuable. If I buy the pit bull, that would be the most valuable thing I own. I’d have to buy something to protect it then.
NORM MACDONALD -
I don’t care for sex. I find it an embarrassing, dull exercise. I prefer sports, where you can win.
NORM MACDONALD -
I don’t know the difference between a hippie and a hipster but, it’s fun to watch either one of them get beat up.
NORM MACDONALD -
Liberty, like health, appears most precious when lost.
NORM MACDONALD -
I generally have a real strong idea or a strong punchline, and I just try to get to it by rambling around, as I don’t like to memorize words.
NORM MACDONALD -
Ignorance is better than knowledge misapplied.
NORM MACDONALD -
Reason is always weak where prejudice is strong.
NORM MACDONALD -
I don’t have any ambition.
NORM MACDONALD -
I always told everybody the perfect joke would be where the setup and punch line were identical.
NORM MACDONALD -
A readiness to excuse some faults, shows a disposition to commit others.
NORM MACDONALD -
I think clever people think that poor people are stupid.
NORM MACDONALD