The standard of morals is as variable as morals themselves; of which every nation has a different code, and every custom a different reading.
NORM MACDONALDDuring misfortunes, nothing aggravates our condition more, than to be esteemed deserving of them.
More Norm MacDonald Quotes
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A great cause of evil in the world is that men seldom think themselves criminal if they offer the same injustice to others that has been successfully practiced on themselves.
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All that weak people learn from disappointment, is less confidence in future enterprise.
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Hypocrisy is the outward acknowledgment of inward shame.
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Comedy is surprises, so if you’re intending to make somebody laugh and they don’t laugh, that’s funny.
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There are two things at which most men are grieved: when their faults are exposed, and when their virtues are concealed.
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Flattery succeeds best on minds previously occupied by conceit.
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Imprudent restrictions often force youth farther than enticement would carry them; and careless limitation is frequently worse than no injunction.
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The praise we seek for our own virtues sometimes tempts us to flatter the imperfections of other men.
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I don’t really like politics that much. And I like the order and simplicity of sports. They have an ending. You can argue with your friends about it, but in the end you still like sports. I almost love the fantasy world of sports more than the real world.
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Some people are so much afraid of being deceived, that they never venture to trust; like misers, their avarice destroys their gain.
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We often suffer more from our fears, than from the dangers of our situation.
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I always told everybody the perfect joke would be where the setup and punch line were identical.
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You know, with Hitler, the more I learn about that guy, the more I don’t care for him.
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All my life’s about is cracking up people and them cracking me up and trying not to think about dying. That doesn’t cost very much money.
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Ignorance is better than knowledge misapplied.
NORM MACDONALD