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You can’t go around hoping that most people have sterling moral characters. The most you can hope for is that people will pretend that they do.

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Character Do Help Hope Moral Most People Pretend

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Marilyn Monroe Paulo Coelho Abraham Lincoln C. S. Lewis Khalil Gibran Charlie Chaplin Gautama Buddha Isaac Newton

Calling a taxi in Texas is like calling a rabbi in Iraq.
FRAN LEBOWITZ

Country Taxi Vall
My desire to curtail undue freedom of speech extends only to such public areas as restaurants, airports, streets, hotel lobbies, parks, and department stores.
FRAN LEBOWITZ

Airport Area Departmental Desire Freedom Hotel Lobby Public Restaurant Speech Store Street Undue
Designer clothes worn by children are like snowsuits worn by adults. Few can carry it off successfully.
FRAN LEBOWITZ

Adult Children Cloth Designer Few Snowsuit Successfully Worn
To put it rather bluntly, I am not the type who wants to go back to the land; I am the type who wants to go back to the hotel.
FRAN LEBOWITZ

Back Bluntly Hotel Land Rather Type Want
No animal should ever jump up on the dining-room furniture unless absolutely certain that he can hold his own in the conversation.
FRAN LEBOWITZ

Absolute Animal Bless Conversation Denim Room Furniture Jump Own Room
Don’t bother discussing sex with small children. They rarely have anything to add.
FRAN LEBOWITZ

Anything Bother Children Discuss Small
Verbal exchanges between consenting adults in private are as of little interest to me as they probably are to them.
FRAN LEBOWITZ

Adult Between Consent exchange Interest Little Private Probably Verbal
I never met anyone who didn’t have a very smart child. What happens to these children, you wonder, when they reach adulthood?
FRAN LEBOWITZ

Adulthood Anyone Child Children Happen never Smart Wonder
Never relinquish clothing to a hotel valet without first specifically telling him that you want it back.
FRAN LEBOWITZ

Back Cloth Hotel Relinquish Specified Tell Want
If you are truly serious abut preparing your child for the future, don’t teach him to subtract teach him to deduct.
FRAN LEBOWITZ

Child Deduct Future Prepare Serious Subtract Teach
Being a woman is of special interest only to aspiring male transsexuals. To actual women, it is simply a good excuse not to play football.
FRAN LEBOWITZ

Actual Being Excuse Football Good Interest Male Play Simply Special Transsexual Woman
Romantic love is mental illness. But it’s a pleasurable one. It’s a drug. It distorts reality, and that’s the point of it. It would be impossible to fall in love with someone that you really saw.
FRAN LEBOWITZ

Distort Drug Illness Impossible Love Mental Pleasurable Point Really Romantic Saw
If you are of the opinion that the contemplation of suicide is sufficient evidence of a poetic nature, do not forget that actions speak louder than words.
FRAN LEBOWITZ

Action Contemplation Evidence Louder Nature Opinion Peortic Speak Suicide Word
Stand firm in your refusal to remain conscious during algebra. In real life, I assure you, there is no such thing as algebra.
FRAN LEBOWITZ

Algebra Assure Conscious Life Real Refuse Stand Such Thing
In real life, I assure you, there is no such thing as algebra.
FRAN LEBOWITZ

Algebra Assure Life Real Such Thing
If you are a dog and your owner suggests that you wear a sweater suggest that he wear a tail.
FRAN LEBOWITZ

Dog Owner Suggest Sweater Tail Were

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