The only thing chicken about Israel is their soup.
BOB HOPEPersonally, I never drink on Oscar nights, as it interferes with my suffering.
More Bob Hope Quotes
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On one hole, I hit an alligator so hard, he’s now my golf bag.
BOB HOPE -
My idea of Christmas, whether old-fashioned or modern, is very simple: loving others. Come to think of it, why do we have to wait for Christmas to do that?
BOB HOPE -
Jimmy Stewart could have been a good golfer, but he speaks so slowly that by the time he yells ‘Fore!’ the guy he’s hit is already in an ambulance on the way to the hospital.
BOB HOPE -
I asked the colonel what type of aircraft it was, and he said, “Don’t worry about it, Bob. . . if you can see it, it’s obsolete.”
BOB HOPE -
The only troulbe is that when I win, I always have to engage and attorney before I can draw the money.
BOB HOPE -
We flew over to England by the same route Churchill took. It was easy. All we had to do was follow the cigar ashes.
BOB HOPE -
Dying is to be avoided because it can ruin your whole career.
BOB HOPE -
Congratulations to whoever is finally booking music we love. It’s going to get us out of the house after dark!
BOB HOPE -
I have too much money invested in sweaters.
BOB HOPE -
Sure Vietnam is a dirty war. I’ve never heard of a clean one.
BOB HOPE -
When we recall the past, we usually find that it is the simplest things – not the great occasions – that in retrospect give off the greatest glow of happiness.
BOB HOPE -
Chiropractic is a wonderful means of natural healing!
BOB HOPE -
When you get over 95, every day is your day.
BOB HOPE -
The firm is really ahead of the times. It has a stock market ticker that prints its report on thin aspirins.
BOB HOPE -
A very, very religious man. Every time I eat a peanut, I feel immortal.
BOB HOPE