A sense of humor is good for you. Have you ever heard of a laughing hyena with heart burn?
BOB HOPEThe high point of the act is when he (Uri Durov) puts his head inside the bear’s huge jaws. I wouldn’t even try that with my agent.
More Bob Hope Quotes
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I have the perfect simplified tax form for government. Why don’t they just print our money with a return address on it?
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I ruined my hands in the ring. The referee kept stepping on them.
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I was lucky I wasn’t a better boxer, or that’s what I’d be now – a punchy ex-pug.
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Pebble Beach is Alcatraz with grass.
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Timing is the essence of life, and definitely of comedy.
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Golf is a funny game. It’s done much for health, and at the same time has ruined people by robbing them of their peace of mind. Look at me, I’m the healthiest idiot in the world.
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I have seen what a laugh can do. It can transform almost unbearable tears into something bearable, even hopeful.
BOB HOPE -
I have performed for 12 presidents and entertained only six.
BOB HOPE -
A Freudian slip is when you say one thing but mean your mother.
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The good news is that Jesus is coming back. The bad news is that he’s really pissed off.
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Tokyo cab drivers are all ex-kamikaze pilots.
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It’s amazing how many people you see on TV. I did my first television show a month ago, and the next day five million television sets were sold. The people who couldn’t sell theirs threw them away.
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Most of the people who came for dancing lessons had Rumba ambitions and minuet bodies
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I do try to work out a little. I go swimming twice a day. It beats buying golf balls.
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Dying is to be avoided because it can ruin your whole career.
BOB HOPE