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The stealth bomber is supposed to be a big deal. It flies in undetected, bombs, then flies away. Hell, I’ve been doing that all my life.

Bob Hope

When I miss a shot I just think what a beautiful day it is. And what pure fresh air I’m breathing. Then I take a deep breath. I have to do that. That’s what gives me the strength to break the club.
BOB HOPE

Beautiful Break Breathing Miss Strength
I was called Rembrandt Hope in my boxing days, because I spent so much time on the canvas.
BOB HOPE

Boxing Canvas Funny Sports
If you think golf is relaxing, you’re not playing it right.
BOB HOPE

Golf Relax Right Thinking
Golf is my profession Show business is just to pay the green fees.
BOB HOPE

Business Golf Green Pay
I do benefits for all religions – I’d hate to blow the hereafter on a technicality.
BOB HOPE

Friend Funny Hate Inspiration
Television is the box they buried entertainment in.
BOB HOPE

Boxes Entertainment Television
Laughter is therapy-an instant vacation.
BOB HOPE

Instant Laughter Vacation
America is a country where the Olympics and the divorce lawyers both have the same slogan – Go for the Gold.
BOB HOPE

Country Funny Humorous
A few years ago he had a big heart transplant in Chicago, a five-hour operation. It took the doctors four hours to get him on the operating table.
BOB HOPE

Doctors Funny Heart Operating Table
I have performed for 12 presidents and entertained only six.
BOB HOPE

Men President Six
Culture is the ability to describe Jane Russell without moving your hands
BOB HOPE

Culture Hands Moving
I have the perfect simplified tax form for government. Why don’t they just print our money with a return address on it?
BOB HOPE

Addresses Government Perfect Return
Please don’t stand up on my account.
BOB HOPE

Account Line One Please Stand
If my golf game was a prize fight, they’d stop it.
BOB HOPE

Fighting Games Golf
You know you’ve reached middle age when your weightlifting consists merely of standing up.
BOB HOPE

Age Country Middle People Weightlifting
Milton Hope led the singing of Happy Birthday … He would say, ‘Keep it sweet and short and don’t try to be funny.’
BOB HOPE

Singing Sweet Trying

The stealth bomber is supposed to be a big deal. It flies in undetected, bombs, then flies away. Hell, I’ve been doing that all my life.

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The stealth bomber is supposed to be a big deal. It flies in undetected, bombs, then flies away. Hell, I’ve been doing that all my life.

Related Topics

Popular Authors

More Bob Hope Quotes