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Congratulations to whoever is finally booking music we love. It’s going to get us out of the house after dark!

Bob Hope

I have performed for 12 presidents and entertained only six.
BOB HOPE

Men President Six
You can calculate Zsa Zsa Gabor’s age by the rings on her fingers.
BOB HOPE

Age Calculate Fingers Rings
I’ve been playing the game so long that my handicap is in Roman numerals.
BOB HOPE

Games Golf Numeral Roman
Most of the people who came for dancing lessons had Rumba ambitions and minuet bodies
BOB HOPE

Ambition Dancing People
Television is the box they buried entertainment in.
BOB HOPE

Boxes Entertainment Television
Golf is a game that needlessly prolongs the lives of some of our most useless citizens.
BOB HOPE

Citizen Funny Golf Hope
YOU CAN ONLY DO ONE THING AT A TIME SO CONCENTRATE ON IT.
BOB HOPE

Concentrate Grandchildren One Thing Tim
You know you’ve reached middle age when your weightlifting consists merely of standing up.
BOB HOPE

Age Country Middle People Weightlifting
For the first time, you can actually see the losers turn green
BOB HOPE

Firsts Green Oscars
Everybody is afraid they won’t have any money after they die, but Jack Benny discovered a way to take it with him. He had his appendix taken out and a piggy bank put in.
BOB HOPE

Discover Funny Money Taken
The workers love Khrushchev very much. He hasn’t got an enemy in the entire country. Quite a few under it.
BOB HOPE

Country Funny Humorous
People who throw kisses are hopelessly lazy.
BOB HOPE

Country Kissing Lazy Love People
You could buy my book in a paperback edition for a dollar, and in hard covers for $3.50. And for fifty cents extra.
BOB HOPE

Book Funny Reading
Congratulations to whoever is finally booking music we love. It’s going to get us out of the house after dark!
BOB HOPE

Congratulations Dark House
He hits the ball 130 yards and his jewelry goes 150.
BOB HOPE

Balls Go Golf Yards
Golf is my profession Show business is just to pay the green fees.
BOB HOPE

Business Golf Green Pay

Congratulations to whoever is finally booking music we love. It’s going to get us out of the house after dark!

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Popular Authors

Congratulations to whoever is finally booking music we love. It’s going to get us out of the house after dark!

Related Topics

Popular Authors

More Bob Hope Quotes