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You can calculate Zsa Zsa Gabor’s age by the rings on her fingers.

Bob Hope

I don’t know what people have against Jimmy Carter. He’s done nothing.
BOB HOPE

Carter Done Nothing People
Milton Hope led the singing of Happy Birthday … He would say, ‘Keep it sweet and short and don’t try to be funny.’
BOB HOPE

Singing Sweet Trying
I led such a sheltered life I didn’t go out with girls until I was almost four.
BOB HOPE

Four Girl Lives Sheltered
I asked the colonel what type of aircraft it was, and he said, “Don’t worry about it, Bob. . . if you can see it, it’s obsolete.”
BOB HOPE

Aircraft Asked Bob Obsolete Type Worry
Timing is the essence of life, and definitely of comedy.
BOB HOPE

Comedy Definitely Essence Life
I’ve got to watch myself these days. It’s too exciting watching anyone else.
BOB HOPE

Days Line One These Watches
I do benefits for all religions – I’d hate to blow the hereafter on a technicality.
BOB HOPE

Friend Funny Hate Inspiration
When they asked Jack Benny to do something for the Actor’s Orphanage – he shot both his parents and moved in.
BOB HOPE

Actors Comedy Parent
Chiropractic is a wonderful means of natural healing!
BOB HOPE

Healing Mean Wonderful
I have too much money invested in sweaters.
BOB HOPE

Invested Sweater
The home videos aren’t as good, but they are seeming to get better.
BOB HOPE

Better Get Home Video
Everybody knows what California smog is – that’s fog with the vitamins removed.
BOB HOPE

Country Fog Funny Remove
Congratulations to whoever is finally booking music we love. It’s going to get us out of the house after dark!
BOB HOPE

Congratulations Dark House
You know what a fan letter is – it’s just an inky raspberry.
BOB HOPE

Fans Letters Raspberries
People who throw kisses are hopelessly lazy.
BOB HOPE

Country Kissing Lazy Love People
I’ve never wanted an Oscar, although they are reassuring to an actor who doesn’t know how really great he is.
BOB HOPE

Actors Oscar Reassuring

You can calculate Zsa Zsa Gabor’s age by the rings on her fingers.

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Popular Authors

You can calculate Zsa Zsa Gabor’s age by the rings on her fingers.

Related Topics

Popular Authors

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