I have too much money invested in sweaters.
BOB HOPESure Vietnam is a dirty war. I’ve never heard of a clean one.
More Bob Hope Quotes
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I have performed for 12 presidents and entertained only six.
BOB HOPE -
Perfume acts as an anesthetic. By the time she floats a little your way, you’ll promise her anything.
BOB HOPE -
If you think golf is relaxing, you’re not playing it right.
BOB HOPE -
Tokyo cab drivers are all ex-kamikaze pilots.
BOB HOPE -
Everybody is afraid they won’t have any money after they die, but Jack Benny discovered a way to take it with him. He had his appendix taken out and a piggy bank put in.
BOB HOPE -
A sense of humor is good for you. Have you ever heard of a laughing hyena with heart burn?
BOB HOPE -
When I miss a shot I just think what a beautiful day it is. And what pure fresh air I’m breathing. Then I take a deep breath. I have to do that. That’s what gives me the strength to break the club.
BOB HOPE -
Kids are wonderful, but I like mine barbecued.
BOB HOPE -
You could buy my book in a paperback edition for a dollar, and in hard covers for $3.50. And for fifty cents extra.
BOB HOPE -
I come around to your house personally and wet your finger while you’re turning the pages.
BOB HOPE -
I’ve been married fifty-five years and I’ve been home three weeks.
BOB HOPE -
People who throw kisses are hopelessly lazy.
BOB HOPE -
It was a great honour to be inducted into the Hall of Fame. I didn’t know they had a caddie division.
BOB HOPE -
I was called Rembrandt Hope in my boxing days, because I spent so much time on the canvas.
BOB HOPE -
The Governor has no presidential aspirations. In fact he just made a tour of 43 states just to tell them he’s not running for anything.
BOB HOPE