I was lucky, you know, I always had a beautiful girl and the money was good. Although I would have done the whole thing over for, oh, perhaps half.
BOB HOPEMy next door neighbor just had a pacemaker installed. They’re still working the bugs out, though. Every time he makes love, my garage door opens.
More Bob Hope Quotes
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I was there. I saw your sons and your husbands, your brothers and your sweethearts. I saw how they worked, played, fought, and lived. I saw some of them die.
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Dying is to be avoided because it can ruin your whole career.
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The old water heater in my dressing room was working, but it was kind of tired. It gave off about as much warmth as an agent’s handshake.
BOB HOPE -
A sense of humor is good for you. Have you ever heard of a laughing hyena with heart burn?
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Contrary to what certain comedians have led you to believe, the national French pastime is picnicking.
BOB HOPE -
The only troulbe is that when I win, I always have to engage and attorney before I can draw the money.
BOB HOPE -
The high point of the act is when he (Uri Durov) puts his head inside the bear’s huge jaws. I wouldn’t even try that with my agent.
BOB HOPE -
Happiness is watching the TV at your girlfriend’s house during a power failure.
BOB HOPE -
A James Cagney love scene is one where he lets the other guy live.
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Not that they were that anxious to see Ronnie as President; they were afraid if he didn’t get elected, he’d go back to acting.
BOB HOPE -
Free speech isn’t dead in Germany and Italy, merely the speakers.
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There’s a very apt saying in show business: “If you don’t go over budget in Paris, you’re either very rich or very sick. “
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My next door neighbor just had a pacemaker installed. They’re still working the bugs out, though. Every time he makes love, my garage door opens.
BOB HOPE -
When they asked Jack Benny to do something for the Actor’s Orphanage – he shot both his parents and moved in.
BOB HOPE -
Whenever I play with him , I usually try to make it a foursome – the President, myself, a paramedic and a faith healer.
BOB HOPE