The service at the Imperial (Tokyo) is the finest I’ve encountered anywhere. There was a button next to my bed marked ROOM SERVICE – and a maid to press it for me.
BOB HOPEMy next door neighbor just had a pacemaker installed. They’re still working the bugs out, though. Every time he makes love, my garage door opens.
More Bob Hope Quotes
-
-
There’s a very apt saying in show business: “If you don’t go over budget in Paris, you’re either very rich or very sick. “
BOB HOPE -
The stealth bomber is supposed to be a big deal. It flies in undetected, bombs, then flies away. Hell, I’ve been doing that all my life.
BOB HOPE -
The workers love Khrushchev very much. He hasn’t got an enemy in the entire country. Quite a few under it.
BOB HOPE -
Everybody knows what California smog is – that’s fog with the vitamins removed.
BOB HOPE -
I never kick my ball in the rough or improve my lie in a sand trap. For that I have a caddie.
BOB HOPE -
Golf is a game that needlessly prolongs the lives of some of our most useless citizens.
BOB HOPE -
I have seen what a laugh can do. It can transform almost unbearable tears into something bearable, even hopeful.
BOB HOPE -
Congratulations to whoever is finally booking music we love. It’s going to get us out of the house after dark!
BOB HOPE -
Jimmy Stewart could have been a good golfer, but he speaks so slowly that by the time he yells ‘Fore!’ the guy he’s hit is already in an ambulance on the way to the hospital.
BOB HOPE -
Out here in the Pacific, they have typhoons and hurricanes that blow over 200 miles an hour. We have tornadoes and hurricanes back home, but I don’t worry about them. The mortgage on my house is so heavy that nothing could budge it.
BOB HOPE -
It’s not hard to find Gerry Ford on a golf course – you just follow the wounded.
BOB HOPE -
Now that the war is winding down, I want to say I do appreciate you fellows hanging around here – just for me.
BOB HOPE -
It’s very frustrating making a picture in Paris. We work hard all day at the studio to get a love scene just right. Then, on my way home, I see couples on every street corner doing it better.
BOB HOPE -
Please don’t stand up on my account.
BOB HOPE -
She spoke perfect English, which led to considerable trouble. She couldn’t understand us at all.
BOB HOPE