Free speech isn’t dead in Germany and Italy, merely the speakers.
BOB HOPEMost of the people who came for dancing lessons had Rumba ambitions and minuet bodies
More Bob Hope Quotes
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I’d give up golf if I didn’t have so many sweaters.
BOB HOPE -
We have 51 golf courses in Palm Springs. He [President Ford] never decides which course he will play until after the first tee shot.
BOB HOPE -
I asked the colonel what type of aircraft it was, and he said, “Don’t worry about it, Bob. . . if you can see it, it’s obsolete.”
BOB HOPE -
It’s a wonderful world. It may destroy itself but you’ll be able to watch it all on TV.
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I’ve been playing the game so long that my handicap is in Roman numerals.
BOB HOPE -
When she started to play, Steinway came down personally and rubbed his name off the piano.
BOB HOPE -
The service at the Imperial (Tokyo) is the finest I’ve encountered anywhere. There was a button next to my bed marked ROOM SERVICE – and a maid to press it for me.
BOB HOPE -
It’s not hard to find Gerry Ford on a golf course – you just follow the wounded.
BOB HOPE -
US President Gerald Ford’s golf was so bad we thought he was a ‘Hitman for the PGA!
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I’ve got to watch myself these days. It’s too exciting watching anyone else.
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Jimmy Stewart could have been a good golfer, but he speaks so slowly that by the time he yells ‘Fore!’ the guy he’s hit is already in an ambulance on the way to the hospital.
BOB HOPE -
Out here in the Pacific, they have typhoons and hurricanes that blow over 200 miles an hour. We have tornadoes and hurricanes back home, but I don’t worry about them. The mortgage on my house is so heavy that nothing could budge it.
BOB HOPE -
All British castles and old country homes are supposed to be haunted. It’s in the lease.
BOB HOPE -
Contrary to what certain comedians have led you to believe, the national French pastime is picnicking.
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A sense of humor is good for you. Have you ever heard of a laughing hyena with heart burn?
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Golf is a funny game. It’s done much for health, and at the same time has ruined people by robbing them of their peace of mind. Look at me, I’m the healthiest idiot in the world.
BOB HOPE -
I have too much money invested in sweaters.
BOB HOPE -
A Freudian slip is when you say one thing but mean your mother.
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America is a country where the Olympics and the divorce lawyers both have the same slogan – Go for the Gold.
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If you think golf is relaxing, you’re not playing it right.
BOB HOPE -
Failure is the only thing I’ve ever been a success at.
BOB HOPE -
The good news is that Jesus is coming back. The bad news is that he’s really pissed off.
BOB HOPE -
Culture is the ability to describe Jane Russell without moving your hands
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Sure, we did need the oil in America. How else could Dolly Parton get into some of her dresses?
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There are many talented English personalities, but unfortunately they were all in Hollywood.
BOB HOPE -
Laughter is therapy-an instant vacation.
BOB HOPE