Television is where you earn regular money so you can plan a little bit but even then only when you have a regular gig. If you’re just doing the odd appearance, you don’t know if it will carry on.
BILL BAILEYYes. Yes, when we live our life like 1950s detective films. I often go to my fridge, “Hullo, we’re out of milk. I say mother, where’s the milk?”
More Bill Bailey Quotes
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I try to appreciate the simple things. I’ve just been camping with my son and I enjoyed that just as much if not more than a holiday in a posh hotel. I like making a cup of tea and bacon sarnie in the morning.
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Add a drop of lavender to milk, leave town with an orange, and pretend you’re laughing at it.
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There we go, that’s it. I just hold my hand in this position for the next couple of hours.
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Do not crush the flowers of wisdom with the hobnail boots of cynicism.
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I know that to be a true fact because I read it in Heat magazine
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I feel sorry for James Blunt, he has to wake up every morning and think ‘Oh my God, I’m James Blunt, what have I done?’
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The BBC did a survey of the top 50 things to do before we die. Not while we’re still alive, before we die.
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I am a confectionery-based existentialist.
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I spent my childhood scrambling round badgers and foxes and playing fantastic country kid games like knocking on people’s doors and running away. God that was a good game.
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I’m quite lucky, because I’ve got a small, decorative concrete pig.
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Three blokes go into a pub. One of them is a little bit stupid, and the whole scene unfolds with a tedious inevitability.
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My wife bought me a vintage Gibson guitar that isn’t just beautiful but has tremendous sentimental value. I have plenty of guitars for live gigs but this is one to treasure.
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Three blokes go into a pub. Something happens. The outcome was hilarious!
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There’s more evil in the charts than an Al-Qaeda suggestion box.
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Work hard, save and live within your means.
BILL BAILEY