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I’d like to be rich enough so I could throw soap away after the letters are worn off.

Andy Rooney

The average dog is a nicer person than the average person.
ANDY ROONEY

Average Dog Nice Person
If, on the other hand, happiness depends on a good breakfast, flowers in the yard, a drink or a nap, then we are more likely to live with quite a bit of happiness.
ANDY ROONEY

Drink Goodness Hands Happiness Live Quite
If you smile when no one else is around, you really mean it.
ANDY ROONEY

Alone Happiness Smile Yourself
I’ve learned that under everyone’s hard shell is someone who wants to be appreciated and loved.
ANDY ROONEY

Appreciation Hard Learning Love
I didn’t get old on purpose, it just happened. If you’re lucky, it could happen to you.
ANDY ROONEY

Luck Old Purpose Yourself
One of the sweetest things in life: a letter from a friend.
ANDY ROONEY

Friendship Letter Life Oneself Sweet
The third rule of life is this: Everything you buy today is smaller, more expensive, and not as good as it was yesterday.
ANDY ROONEY

Expensive Goodness Rule Small Yourself
Sooner or later the world will have to return to the good old days when we fought wars and killed people the old-fashioned way, one at a time.
ANDY ROONEY

Goodness Kill Old Oneself People Return Time World
Death is a distant rumor to the young.
ANDY ROONEY

Death Distant One Liner Young
Most of us aren’t that interested in getting rich- we just don’t want to get poor.
ANDY ROONEY

Focus Interest Perspective Poor Rich
Nothing in fine print is ever good news.
ANDY ROONEY

Goodness News Print
I’ve learned, That when your newly born grandchild holds your little finger in his little fist, that you’re hooked for life.
ANDY ROONEY

Born Fingers Hold Life Yourself
My most serious character flaw is that I don’t deny myself much.
ANDY ROONEY

Character Flaw Myself Serious
Once you pass forty, a dime isn’t worth bending over to pick up if you drop one.
ANDY ROONEY

Drop Oneself Worth
Do I have opinions that might piss people off? Yes – that’s what I’m here for.
ANDY ROONEY

Myself Opinion People
I’ve learned that life is like a roll of toilet paper. The closer it gets to the end, the faster it goes.
ANDY ROONEY

End Fast Learning Myself Paper

I’d like to be rich enough so I could throw soap away after the letters are worn off.

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I’d like to be rich enough so I could throw soap away after the letters are worn off.

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