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Women realize it’s not worth buying an entire pig just to get a little sausage!

Andy Rooney

Christians talk as though goodness was their idea but good behavior doesn’t have any religious origin. Our prisons are filled with the devout.
ANDY ROONEY

Goodness Ideas Ourselves Prison Religious
The third rule of life is this: Everything you buy today is smaller, more expensive, and not as good as it was yesterday.
ANDY ROONEY

Expensive Goodness Rule Small Yourself
Vegetarian – that’s an old Indian word meaning lousy hunter.
ANDY ROONEY

Hunter Old Word
If you smile when no one else is around, you really mean it.
ANDY ROONEY

Alone Happiness Smile Yourself
Elephants and grandchildren never forget.
ANDY ROONEY

Animal Forget Grandparents
Unfortunately, propaganda works.
ANDY ROONEY

One Liner Work
Small daily happenings make life spectacular. Start enjoying the small things in life!
ANDY ROONEY

Gratitude Life Small Spectacular
People will generally accept facts as truth only if the facts agree with what they already believe.
ANDY ROONEY

Acceptance Believe Fact General People Truth
I’ve learned, That it’s those small daily happenings that make life so spectacular.
ANDY ROONEY

Appreciation Learning Life Myself Small
The average dog is a nicer person than the average person.
ANDY ROONEY

Average Dog Nice Person
Nothing in fine print is ever good news.
ANDY ROONEY

Goodness News Print
Once you pass forty, a dime isn’t worth bending over to pick up if you drop one.
ANDY ROONEY

Drop Oneself Worth
Would a real man get caught eating a twinkie?
ANDY ROONEY

Eat Food Man Reality
All of us talk faster than we listen.
ANDY ROONEY

Fast Listening Ourselves Talk
The biggest seller is cookbooks and the second is diet books – how not to eat what you’ve just learned how to cook.
ANDY ROONEY

Avoid Book Cook Learning
I don’t like food that’s too carefully arranged; it makes me think that the chef is spending too much time arranging and not enough time cooking. If I wanted a picture I’d buy a painting.
ANDY ROONEY

Arrangement Care Food Myself Paint Photograph Time

Women realize it’s not worth buying an entire pig just to get a little sausage!

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Women realize it’s not worth buying an entire pig just to get a little sausage!

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